#RentingStruggles #LivingAtHome #FamilyFinances
Hey everyone! 👋 So, I’ve been thinking about my living situation and I wanted to get some opinions on it. I currently live in East London (Essex) with my mom, brother, and mom’s partner. Our rent is a whopping £1750 a month, split between the four of us. I’m 24 and my brother is 22, and we give a total of £1000 towards rent as a pair.
Here’s the thing: I feel like we might be paying a bit too much compared to what my friends pay their parents for similar rent amounts. It’s got me feeling a bit unsure about the whole situation.
My mom and her partner both work full-time, so it’s not like they’re not contributing. But my brother and I sometimes find it hard to make ends meet after paying rent. 🤔
Do you think paying £500 per month while living with your parents is considered too much? Any thoughts or suggestions on how to handle this situation? Let’s discuss and share our experiences!
Possible Solution:
– Have an open conversation with your mom and her partner about the financial contributions
– Consider setting up a budget together to ensure everyone’s financial responsibilities are fair and manageable
You have to remember rent is just one aspect of living. Water / electric / gas / council tax are also costs which have to be paid.
Have u tried the food bank?
It isn’t sustainable long term is it. What’s the plan?
If you can’t save any money you’re not really getting towards any sort of future or moving out etc.
I don’t think your mum and her partner are taking advantage or anything
Equally though I see how for you and your brother it probably isn’t much value to you.
What’s your career goal? Have you considered leaving London for lower COL.
Perhaps I am misunderstanding, but you say ‘your’ rent is £1750 and you pay your mum £500. Are you sating the household rent is £1750 in total and your contribution is £500???
How much do you earn?
When I was younger we all paid 20% of oir net income, and that is what I expected ours to do once they have full time employment.
In London £500 does not seem unreasonable. Try live anywhere else in London for double that and you would struggle in sub standard accommodation. You already said your mum gets a little above minimum wage. Her partner works hard for a pretty low to average salary.
Expecting her fully adult sons to contribute to the “rent” and buy their own food is far from unreasonable when you don’t have to worry for a second about the bills and increasing utilities. If anything you are learning valuable life experience. My concern is that you’re not being taught family values, this post demonstrates a lack of empathy and demonstrates a sense of entitlement.
Mum and partner aren’t wealthy. The cost of living has increased hugely and besides your “rent” and food you have no responsibilities. If you think you can do better, leave home. I guarantee you’ll have even less money for food. Be humble, ask your mum to show you and teach you the true expenses she faces. Because in your 20s you should understand this by now. If you think she is profiting in some way you are sorely mistaken!
I mean you wouldn’t get anywhere else in London for £500 a month.
I also don’t fully understand the post, do you mean your mum’s rent is £1,750? And that you and your brother collectively contribute £1,000 towards that?
My partner pays me less
Your minimum wage is exactly the same as your mum or boyfriends. The split depends on what you use in the house. Ie if there are 3 bedrooms and you and your brother have one each then paying just under a third of the rent is a fairly even split to be honest. It’s the same as you’d pay if you were house sharing elsewhere.
If your mum isn’t in a position to financially support you in your mid 20s then that’s just life unfortunately. You aren’t under 18 and they aren’t rich and are only earning a little more than you so I’m not sure how you feel scammed? It’s not like they are making money off you or anything. I can guarantee you’d be paying a lot more that £500 anywhere else and you’d probably have less security and support.
At the end of the day you’re in your mid 20s and if you don’t like it then you’ll have to find somewhere else to live I’m afraid.
It does seem a little high to me but you’re 4 adults and if your “parents” aren’t wealthy then I feel it’s fair that you all pay your fair share. If I was your parent and I could afford it, I’d charge less so that you could save for a deposit etc. but if I couldn’t afford it, it’d be split equally.
One option – call their bluff. If you both move out (say get a shared place), what are they going to do? Can they afford it on their own? Probably not, in which case, I think you then gain the upper hand in rent negotiations.
I feel like it’s too much
Your mum should check whether she and her partner are missing out on Universal Credit.
The acid test, can you do it cheaper elsewhere?
There is no reason why you should be paying more than 25% of the rent. Especially when you and your mum earn similar amounts.
Her partner paying £1,000 is irrelevant, they may have an agreement that is none of your business as to how they split their finances. You are responsible for, and should only be concerned with, your contribution. That goes for your comments and opinions about their incomes as well. Mind your business.
Just say hey I want to make sure I’m contributing my fair share so what is rent, council tax and utilities and divide it by four. You haven’t mentioned council tax anywhere. That’s a big one to leave out and could mean you aren’t paying enough, never mind too much, so be prepared for it go up not just down.
Based on some of your comments, you mentioned that you pay for your own food. Do you also cook it yourself? Is your mom taking care of your laundry, preparing meals, and other tasks? These responsibilities have both time and monetary value which would land on your plate if you move.
I’m not making any assumptions but offering a perspective. As a low earner, your options might be limited, but none of us here truly know your personal situation and what it is like at home for you.
At 24, it’s important to evaluate whether moving out would be beneficial for you. Consider the costs and responsibilities involved. Write them down to see both sides clearly and realistically. This exercise can help you visualize the pros and cons and it might just reveal that your current spend isn’t as bad as it seems.
Edit: Just simply have to add this. The hard truth is that you earn a low salary, which is causing these problems. Yes some parents ask less from their kids, some ask nothing. As I said – do the pros/cons list. Also, some people would see £500-£600 rent as an opportunity to save while living with their parents. You need to look for a better paid job.
I think you’re paying too much given you pay for your own food and utilities.
If you and your brother paying £1k between you and your mums partner is paying £1k where the extra £250 going every month? Thats not right. That money should go towards the utilities or council tax.