#StudentDebt #CreditCardStruggles #ParentalSacrifice #FinancialHelp #FamilySupport
Hey there! It sounds like you’re in a tough situation, but remember, you’re not alone. Many students face similar challenges and emotional dilemmas when dealing with unexpected financial burdens. Let’s dive into some tips and advice to help navigate this tricky situation with your dad paying your tuition on his credit cards.
Understanding the Emotional Impact
First and foremost, it’s crucial to recognize the emotional weight that comes with your dad’s sacrifice. Finding out about this financial burden can evoke a mix of emotions like gratitude, guilt, and empathy towards your dad’s struggles. It’s essential to acknowledge and process these feelings before moving forward.
Open Communication is Key
1. Sit down with your dad in a calm and understanding manner to discuss the situation.
2. Express your gratitude for his sacrifice and assure him that you’re willing to help find a solution.
3. Create a plan together to tackle the credit card debt and ease his financial burden gradually.
Seek Financial Aid and Assistance
1. Look into student loan options or scholarships to alleviate the pressure on your dad.
2. Explore financial counseling services or nonprofit organizations that offer assistance with credit card debt.
3. Consider part-time work or freelance opportunities to contribute to the repayment efforts.
Support and Appreciation
1. Show your dad appreciation for his selfless act and reassure him that you’re committed to helping him through this challenging time.
2. Stay positive and proactive in finding solutions to alleviate the financial strain on your family.
3. Remember, this is a temporary setback, and with teamwork and determination, you can overcome it together.
In conclusion, navigating the aftermath of your dad paying your tuition on his credit cards can be daunting, but with open communication, financial assistance, and mutual support, you can overcome this hurdle as a family. Stay strong, stay positive, and remember that your dad’s sacrifice is a testament to his love and dedication towards your education. You’ve got this! 💪🌟🎓 #FamilyFirst #FinancialEmpathy #TogetherWeCan
> Why can’t they just relax the crazy interest charges in exchange for an agreement to pay x amount every month until its finished WITHOUT tanking his credit or making his life even more miserable? It’s just not fair, he makes his payments, doesnt go out and doesnt spend on consumer trash.
Why would they? He made a decision that is very much in their favor, especially if he’s been a “model” customer – he’s a cash cow that can pay it. He’s more of a “model customer” now than he ever has been. Calling it fair or not isn’t relevant – he made a choice. A very, very poor choice, but a choice.
You can’t put the milk back in the carton, what’s done is done. And there isn’t really much **you** can do personally – retroactive student loans aren’t a thing, you likely don’t have enough income to pull a personal loan out to cover it (can always try). It’s in his court to take a personal loan out to consolidate and lower the interest rates.
This is how Credit cards work. I’m sorry he’s in this spot but he used the cards as they are designed. He has zero leverage for the credit card companies to lower his rate. He could look into a personal loan of HELOC and consolidate that way.
>i would even take out student loans retroactively and pay his cards off with that but I don’t know if that’s legal or even possible.
It’s not, you cannot take out student loans to pay for previous education expenses.
>Why can’t they just relax the crazy interest charges in exchange for an agreement to pay x amount every month until its finished WITHOUT tanking his credit or making his life even more miserable?
Because it’s not profitable to do so. Work out options are offered to people with late payments because they’re at risk of not paying the debt off at all, and a lower interest rate + fixed payment plan is an attractive alternative to having to sue someone to get paid.
>It’s just not fair, he makes his payments, doesnt go out and doesnt spend on consumer trash. His income ratio thing isn’t even bad, like it’s in the positive so I don’t understand why they’re charging him so much when he’s been a model customer his whole life.
Ok, so you feel like this isn’t fair, and that people who spend in ways you find appropriate should have lower interest rates on their credit cards. Credit card companies don’t agree, and that’s what matters here. Spending a bunch of energy on treating this like a moral affront to your Dad isn’t going to get you anywhere.
>Please tell me there’s some sort of answer or like government program to find him a loan or something, anything any scheme with which to indebt myself on his behalf so that he can finally enjoy his own retirement
There’s not. Either one of you qualifies for a personal loan at a rate you find acceptable, your father pays these cards off as he can, or he goes to a lawyer to discuss bankruptcy. He could also just default on the debt and deal with the consequences, which might include an option for a fixed rate payment plan at a lower rate.
You are in college now, its time to be an adult and change your entire attitude, this is how the world works, spend time looking into how debt and finances work
Credit card companies are not your friend, its quite silly to think otherwise
Life is not fair, accept that or dont, your choice
Credit card company did nothing to your parent, your parent entered into an agreement if he is miserable because of that, its his fault
You need to give him money every month. That’s the only solution. If he won’t accept it, buy him things that he needs as gifts; that could be anything from a meal every week to a car.
I took a personal loan out on sofi & it was such an easy process & the interest was far lower than my cc + was a fixed rate
You are spending too much emotional energy asking why credit card companies won’t cut you some special break when the terms for using the cards are clear. And there is no program to help. The best bet is try to consolidate the debt to get better terms…there are multiple ways to do this that doesn’t destroy credit. Bankruptcy or some sort of settlement would.
But in the end he will owe it all and you can help. Also how much is it? 40 to 60…that’s a big difference. In the end that’s not that much that between the two of you that you can’t pay off within a year or two if you really go all out.
I recommend taking some basic personal finance courses as you seem like you are not very knowledgeable about realistic ways to handle debt. One to look at is Finanical Peace University…its about 80 or 90 bucks but it would probably give you the knowledge needed to put together a plan for yourself to get you and your dad out of this hole.
He can get a debt consolidation loan which will have a much lower APR than his credit cards. He would use the loan to pay the cards and then pay the loan. You can help pay down the loan. He could also look into a HELOC to pay off the CC debts and turn them into a closer to 10% interest rate loan.
Lots of options.
Should really have had you do FAFSA instead. You get government loan and don’t have to pay it back until you’re done with school
If he is retired then why does his credit score even matter? Can he file for bankruptcy?
If he has good credit he can look at debt consolidation to get a better rate hopefully. But was a bad decision by your dad…even though well intentioned.
Agree with what everyone already said.
Some other options while not perfect may be available.
1. Get a personal loan with a fixed interest rate and payoff the credit cards.
2. If your dad has good credit get a credit card with a promo 0% interest transfer rate and pay off the highest card. Calculate monthly payment before % goes into effect. You would only pay the transfer rate. I have had to do this before. You just need to be diligent and know when the balloon interest rate takes effect. If you can’t pay the entire amount off you can transfer to another card that has a different 0% interest rate promo.
I have had to do that in the past and while not ideal I only paid interest when I was making the transfer but all the rest was 0% interest.
Maybe get a new card with 0% for balance transfers. I did this for several years, so all payments were going towards principal.
Your dad should be able to consolidate the credit card debt and take out to a lower interest loan to reduce the interest he is paying. $40k-$60k is a lot as far as credit card debt goes. If he has good credit banks would probably be happy to give him a 12-15% interest loan to pay off some of the credit card debt. Have him go to the banks and talk about what his options are, Bank of America would probably be happy to collect 15% instead of the 17-28% discovery charge your dad.
You could get a job or find sources of income to help pay off the loans. You could also apply for no interest cards and use those to pay for day to day expenses so you and dad have more to throw at the cards, but you will need to pay those off in full before the promo rate expires.
Remember a credit score is just a magic number they made up. If the only way out is to do bankruptcy or not pay until they negotiate and he doesn’t need to buy a house or car for 7 years then do it. Don’t get emotionally attached to your credit score, it’s a tool not a badge of honor.
If he’s got enough income it makes sense to try and pay it off, shop around for personal loans. A significantly lower interest rate will really help pay things down.
The lesson here is for you, your dad is not that great with money and therefore you probably are going to have to spend some extra time learning how it all works.
when you start earning decent money, that’s when you can repay him.
I would say get a job and start helping him pay for your loans. It’s gonna suck because you won’t be able to have any fun for a bit. But if your dad means as much to you, than helping him pay it off is number 1 priority. Make sure he not struggling. Got to start budgeting your expenses and start allocating to the loans.
See if he or you can open some balance transfer cards with zero interest to relief some pressure from the CC interest. You may need to roll them over to different cards when the zero interest expires otherwise they’ll catch you with the occured interest. Read the fine print!!! It is temporarily free debt and you usually only have to pay the minimum. But your goal should be to pay them off .
If your dad has equity in his home, take a HELOC at a much better interest rate.
Otherwise as others have said a debt consolation loan will be best.
And yes, student loans would have been the better idea here in my opinion. But I’m sure you and your dad know this by now.
All the best and good luck!
>It’s just not fair
Unfortunately, it is fair. Just because you don’t like the outcome doesn’t mean it isn’t fair. Every other person who charges those amounts on similar credit cards would be charged the same. That’s pretty much the definition of fair.
What you are asking for is the credit card companies to do something that is unfair and treat him better than everyone else. That just shifts the cost from your dad to someone else.
You can look into a personal loan and see if the interest rate is better. It more than likely is. Even if you are able to shift some of it to a personal loan that could help the ball get rolling on paying off the principal at a much faster rate.
If he’s willing to take a credit hit he could stop paying and let it go to collections where you have more leverage for negotiating.
Transfer the balances to 0% interest promo rate cards. There is a small fee to do this but it is included in the promo rate meaning there is no interest on the fee.
if your dad has good credit he should be able to do this in literally minutes online. FNBO often offers this.
Contact So-Fi about a loan that might be more reasonable.
You can pay him back by excelling at your school and getting a good job and working hard to make good money and take care of him for the rest of his life .
He probably should just declare bankruptcy but only after he’s sure he’s not going to need to buy a car soon. Does your mom have a separate credit card that she can LATER add him to so he can rebuild credit. Do NOT take this debt on yourself with a CC. Do not do that
Can you make payments on these cards ?
Dude signed an agreement to borrow money at 28%. Why ever would those companies give a break on that?
If he has great credit and any assets he should get a personal loan, or line of credit or even second mortgage to pay off those cards. BUT then he converts unsecured debt to secured.
Why does he need great credit? Does he own a house? Or just rent? Have him talk to a bankruptcy attorney to see what is possible. Bad credit for 5-7 years is one thing, at his age doing nothing g probably means he dies with this debt and all his estate will go to credit card companies.
Your dad loves you so much it’s awe inspiring(in a good way!). He made a bad decision because of that love , but he absolutely loves you.
I got myself into some credit card debt two/three years ago after being laid off and taking a job making way less five months later. Last December I took out a personal loan to pay off the debt. I owed less than $20k and was the smartest move I made. I can see the end in sight.
If that’s not feasible maybe bankruptcy might be your father’s best option.
You’re really personalizing this between your dad and the CC companies. The fact that he’s been a good customer or had a good credit score means nothing . You’re asking what he can’t get a special deal because he’s a good guy. He’s merely a grain of sand in an ocean of financial institutions. He needs to adhere to the terms of the agreement or refinance in some way. This is strictly business.
Try and get a lower interest loan to pay the credit cards off. You can at least make more progress paying them and a plan.
Unfortunately, a poor decision on his part. He could have co-signed for your student loans and you’d be paying back but he could help you with it.
Balance transfers to 0% ?
I’d get a new credit card…put it away. File for bankruptcy, exempt the house. Depending on how much money he has, they might not let him Chapter 7, he’ll probably do Chapter 13, which will probably still be lower amount than he has been paying.
Or, just stop paying. SS cannot be garnished by debt collectors. If he doesn’t pay, THEN you’ll have credit card companies willing to work with you!
All credit cards always charge double digit interest rates, Big amounts like college, autos etc should handled with a bank loan not a credit card.
The method correct it is federal bankruptcy law. In most states your Dad can reduce or cancel the credit card debt without affecting his home ownership or mortgage. He needs to talk with a bankruptcy lawyer
Argh, why the hell did your dad do this?!
He probably could have gotten far better rates on a [PLUS loan](https://studentaid.gov/understand-aid/types/loans/plus/parent).
Unfortunately it’s too late to go back – you can’t retroactively turn credit card debt into student loan debt. The best thing your dad can do at this point is take out a debt consolidation loan or home equity loan.
***Neither of these options will “tank his credit”*** – it’s just a loan. It’s actually debt-neutral (because he’s already carrying this as *credit card* debt), the new loan will pay off that debt and *free up* his credit card limit which may wind up being a net positive for his credit score.)
*Either* of these options is better than continuing to carry this as credit card debt! He’ll likely have a MUCH lower interest rate in either situation.
Then if you want you can send your dad some portion of the payment on the debt consolidation loan each month so he can enjoy his retirement.
***
> Why can’t they just relax the crazy interest charges in exchange for an agreement to pay x amount every month until its finished WITHOUT tanking his credit or making his life even more miserable? It’s just not fair, he makes his payments, doesnt go out and doesnt spend on consumer trash.
Yeah, no business is going to do that.
Your father entered into a contract with the credit card company. The credit company performed their part (they let him spend the money on credit), they’re not going to let him out of his part (paying them back with interest). There’s no reason for them to: He’s making his payments (and he will continue doing so unless he wants his credit trashed or decides to declare bankruptcy to try to restructure/discharge part of the debt).
Whether or not it’s *fair* is irrelevant: Your dad is an adult, he understood what he was doing, and he made the decision to put your tuition on a card rather than take out a loan.
This is a lesson you should internalize for yourself: As an adult you have the right to enter into contracts, even ones that are not personally advantageous to you. The other party doesn’t have to be “fair” or “relax” the terms you agreed to. They have every right to demand you perform as required by the contract.
Do not rely on the generosity or sympathy of large companies.
I assure you they are incapable of either of those things.
At one point I had 42k in CC debt and managed to pay it off by moving the debt between cards. I think I got 2 offers for 0% interest for 18 months on balance transfers.
Moved 30k of the debt to the zero percent cards while I aggressively paid down anything with a rate. Once I paid off the high rate card they send me an offer for zero percent interest so I swapped some of the bet back to them.
Was a bit of a process but I was able to kill the debt in 3-4 years
You are the poster child for what is wrong in society. He did something dumb. You talk about how you would do something, but you are not actually doing anything (i.e., pay some amount of money each money to help him even if it is a small amount). Then you complain about how unfair it is that he is expected to live up to the agreement he made.
The right answer is that you either do one of two things:
1. Tell him this is a debt he incurred and it is his problem to deal with (crappy approach IMO)
2. Pay something each month to help him out based on whatever you can do
All I can say here is that your father really, really loves you. Cherish that, and don’t ever let it go.
If it’s large enough and he can’t pay his way out then he should look into bankruptcy. It will get things back under control and even though his score will tank for a while it can save him.
Move in with your dad. Find any job that pays a wage, get a part time job. Help your dad pay off your debt.