Title: Coping with Infidelity and Rebuilding Your Life: A Guide for Betrayed Spouses
Introduction:
Discovering your spouse’s infidelity can be a devastating experience that rocks your world and leaves you feeling lost and betrayed. In this comprehensive guide, we will explore the emotional impact of infidelity, the legal aspects of divorce, and strategies for moving forward and rebuilding your life. We will also address concerns related to sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and provide guidance on supporting your children during this challenging time.
Chapter 1: Acknowledging the Emotional Impact:
– Understand that it is natural to experience a wide range of emotions, including shock, anger, sadness, and betrayal.
– Seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a counselor to help you process your emotions and navigate through this difficult period.
– Practice self-care by engaging in activities that promote physical and mental well-being, such as exercise, journaling, or pursuing hobbies.
Chapter 2: Legal Considerations and Divorce Process:
– Consult with a reputable attorney who specializes in family law to understand your rights and options.
– Gather evidence of the infidelity and present it to your attorney to strengthen your case.
– Familiarize yourself with the divorce process, including property division, child custody, and alimony.
– Explore the possibilities of mediation or alternative dispute resolution methods to reduce the emotional strain and costs associated with a lengthy legal battle.
Chapter 3: Coping with the STD Diagnosis:
– Seek medical advice from a healthcare professional who specializes in STDs.
– Understand that having an STD does not make you less deserving of love or happiness in the future.
– Educate yourself about your specific condition, available treatments, and prevention strategies.
– Consider joining support groups or seeking therapy to address any feelings of guilt or shame associated with the diagnosis.
Chapter 4: Nurturing Your Children in the Midst of Chaos:
– Communicate honestly and age-appropriately with your children about the situation while minimizing exposure to conflict between you and your spouse.
– Encourage them to express their emotions and provide a safe space for them to process their feelings.
– Maintain routines and stability as much as possible to ensure a sense of normalcy for your children.
– Consider professional counseling or support groups for your children to aid their emotional healing.
Chapter 5: Rebuilding Your Life and Moving Forward:
– Set realistic goals for yourself and focus on personal growth and self-improvement.
– Surround yourself with a supportive network of friends and family for emotional support and encouragement.
– Explore new hobbies and interests that bring you joy and fulfillment.
– Take time to heal and address any trust issues before entering future relationships.
Conclusion:
Discovering your spouse’s infidelity is undoubtedly a painful experience, but it is possible to rebuild your life and find happiness again. By acknowledging your emotions, seeking legal guidance, addressing your health concerns, and prioritizing your children’s well-being, you can navigate through this challenging period and emerge stronger than ever. Remember, you deserve love, respect, and a fulfilling life, and with time and perseverance, you will find it.
Did you talk to your lawyer about going after him for giving you an STD? He’s a low life.
Take him for all he’s worth and let him quit his job.
Also, is the STD popular enough that there are dating groups that you can join where the people already have it? Also will medicine help keep it contained (I’m unsure the phrasing) ?
I hope your lawyer gets husband on bigamy.
Leave the alimony and child support up to the lawyers and the judge. Just tell your lawyer what he said about quitting his job to avoid child support.
Take him to the cleaners. He can quit his job all he wante courts love to see it and punish the act. Only take half the bank account and hire a pricey lawyer that you want him to pay for (argue this in mediation but go all out) bigamy infidelity child outside of the marriage he hit the trifecta
Honestly my chaotic, unhinged Scorpio self says you should post asking how to communicate the news to your children + that they have a self-sibling and tag the woman saying
“cc @name FYI so you can inform my husband on the recommendations.”
Get an attorney and therapy. Take home for all he is worth and burn every fucking bridge.
That is marriage fraud, it’s an offense in a lot of countries. Keepbto what your lawyer tells you, they should know what do do in your situation best.
Your husband can shoot his mouth off all he likes. Doesn’t mean what he says has any grounding in reality.
Bigamy is a crime in most of the world. He’s also been living under an assumed name, which I’m betting is on his youngest’s birth certificates. That’s a whole lotta legal mess right there, and this will only bolster your case in court.
In many jurisdictions, child support and alimony are separate. He will owe child support unless the final custody agreement is 50/50, or he is awarded more custody time than you. And even then, many jurisdictions will forgo child support only if both parties agree and/or both parties have similar incomes.
Alimony typically is for supporting a former spouse if one ex partner was paying for a majority of the household expenses/lifestyle. So, if you were a SAHM, in most jurisdictions you’d qualify for alimony.
His youngest child will not necessarily be factored into the divorce settlement, child support, or alimony. Just because he chose to have two families doesn’t negate his obligations to you and your children. And the youngest child and second wife are not parties to your divorce.
Get a lawyer, stand firm, and take him to the cleaners.
Without knowing more about your circumstances or location, the best advice we can give is to get a good divorce lawyer and do whatever they tell you. Generally, it isn’t up to your ex whether or not you get alimony or child support, it’s up to the judge. And they are extremely wise to the games that people play to avoid giving CS, so he’s still going to pay a decent amount whether or not he has a job.
TIL in some states some states like CA don’t require you to list a parent’s family name as a surname on a birth certificate. I was wondering how using a pseudonym last name would be legal. Also an interesting detail that you discovered the sister wife commenting on someone’s post about poisoning her husband… a felony in some areas
Did you friend request his other account?
Let the lawyers handle everything OP. This guy is a scumbag. Don’t be scared about having an STD and dating! If you look online there is even specific websites for dating for people with STD’s. It’s very common and nothing you should be ashamed of. There’s a whole community of people out there that share your same struggle.
If my husband gave me an STD … and I would know full well it didn’t come from me… I would have kicked him out there and then!!!
OP what happened that he made you doubt yourself??? Like????
You knew he was cheating a while back when he gave you the STD. No better proof than that.
Start recording your conversations if possible.. let him say will quit his job to not pay.. let lawyers do their thing.. also see if can get him for civil ceremony and giving you an std.. Throw everything at him. You have nothing to lose he has everything with his new woman. She isn’t going to stay if he’s left with nothing. Heck her for alienation of affection..
I would take him to the cleaners, I would tell his family and his friends. Never protect a cheater, they often tell people you cheated to protect themselves, you gave him STI. I knew when he accused you, it was his issue…Who does that to someone they love no one…Then get up and take your life back. Work make more money (even if it takes awhile) Get some talk therapy to get over this. Then marry tall dark and handsome and faithful…YOu know this is going to blow up….
You have a lawyer? Tell the lawyer about him threatening to quit his job so that he will only pay the ‘bare minimum.’ Give all the info. Let the lawyers fight it out. Don’t forget proof of infidelity and him being a bigamist.
Remember this too, if he quits his job to pay the bare minimum, his ‘new family’ will also suffer, and the likelihood is, the other woman/AP will not stand around for that crap too. Of course, your stbx is probably going to go after younger and naive women from this day on so they can ‘support’ him instead. I’ve seen that happen way too much. Hopefully, none of those women will stay put. Let him suffer the minimum wage he earns as it’ll hinder him too from having a better life.
Good luck, OP.
You can sue him for deception of identity. You can tell the judge he has been living two separate lives and you can sue him for his property as well. As he had not only lied about his identity but he had other assets outside of the marriage. Thus he would have to pay you back because he spent money outside of the marriage!!
You can also press charges as he had giving you an STD as a result of the affair!
NEVER BACK DOWN! NEVER GIVE UP!!!
If you decide to blast her in that group, please let us know the name of the group. I’m rooting for her downfall. 😆
You sue him for the std for infecting you when he likely knew he had it. You divorce him and instruct your attorney to go after maximum child support and inform the attorney of his threat of quitting his job. They will impose the support through payroll deduction before he gets paid if you are in the US. I have also heard of judges threaten to hit people with contempt of court and jail time if they quit a job to avoid support. Take no prisoners with this guy. He clearly cares nothing about you or your health or even his own children with you. You owe him nothing. If he complains tell hi. He made his own bed so now he can lay in it with her.
Girl, do NOT be afraid of taking this guy for every goddamn penny and thing he owns. Let your lawyers go after everything!
Oh honey you get the meanest freaking lawyer, this dude is a fool and good chance that he has spent marital funds on his mistress. Do it fast fast fast to protect benefits for yourself and your kids, his other family is his problem, your kids are your priority.
VERY IMPORTANT! You will win this case, the house, his finances, alimony and child support! First, stay with numbers and shut your mouth with the unnecessary words or talks in and outside of court. Lawyers fee is $400/hr and that is $6.66/ minute, nice number huh… Your gripes would cost you to your lawyers. Second, get all his and your tax records, bank accounts for the past 3 years. Fourth, organize your records before you consult a lawyer that MUST be specific for family law, good with numbers and prefer the one just a block away from the courthouse. The court will analyze and calculate the alimony and child support. They have system that is congruent with this based from the laws. Be SURE to automatically set your child support and ALIMONY directly from the court to your bank account so no bickering and interaction with that “fine man”. Tell your husband and that wonderful woman that bigamy is a crime!
This is the best advice you can get from a man that cheated his wife!
My ex gave me HSV2 and it has changed my life entirely. I’m sorry this all happened to you.
Sweetheart, if you can get proof of him threatening to quit his job to a lower paying one, a judge will still make him pay the higher amount. That’s fraudulent. He’ll get into a lot of trouble for that. Call his bluff and take him to the cleaners sister!
Let’s see how long his new “wife” wants him when he’s got no job. What a sack of shit.
Change the locks on your home & let your lawyer handle everything.