Have you encountered someone who has undergone gender affirming surgery? What should I do to support my cousin who is considering it while facing opposition from family? My cousin is 15 years old and I need advice on how to handle the situation. #GenderAffirmingSurgery #SupportingFamily #CousinAdvice #TeenagerSupport
Depends how old he is
don’t do it
I would wait until they’re fully grown up
It’s just better to wait for adulthood to make these kinds of decisions because they’re so life changing
I mean, I don’t think anyone below the ages of 18 can get that surgery. I mean it kinda depends on where you live tho. And even than the gender affirming surgery is ALOT more complicated than it looks, like not the surgery itself but the process of getting one? Yes.
i know a 17 (?) year old who got top surgery a couple months ago
Aa someone who knows about gender affirming care. I would say to wait for surgery until at least 16. But maybe until 18, depending on their maturity. If they aren’t already taking or waiting for hormones, then maybe that is something to consider while they wait for surgery.
Where is that legal at 15?
It is a life changing decision that has no going back. Pretty obvious that it’s a adult only thing
I know a guy whos had top surgery, hes super chill. He have me some of his binders cause he didnt need them anymore haha. He was 17 at the time
Like genital surgery? That doesn’t happen under 18.
Gender affirming surgery is 9/10 not given to people this young. ever. Majority of doctors will not even consider operating on a 15 year old. The youngest person I know to have gotten top surgery was 17, turning 18 the same year, and waited 2-3 years. My friend, who will be getting top surgery soon, is waiting until 18 and has been planning for about 3 years.
Gender affirming surgery should not be a quick and easy decision, and your cousin should take a decent amount of time to think on this and maybe see a trans inclusive therapist. If somehow they can find a surgeon who will operate on them illegally and without parental consent more power to them, I guess
i would never call it a phase or anything but they have to be realllyyyy careful before making decisions at this age. let them do extensive research first if they really wanna do it
At 15 I don’t recommend it this could be something they could severely regret and leave a permanent scar on them always good to wait till 18
I think to have the sergery you need to have a note from a therapist so its 100% something they want. Idk how true this is though
My mums cousin had her testes removed
Personally, I’d wait till I was 16, but other people’s bodies are none of my business. It’s up to them and their parents to decide
I mean, surgery is generally going to be the easiest to do when the patient is fully grown(I.E. 25). So I’d recommend starting with all the other stuff like social transition and potentially hormones first.
Where do you live lol. In most countries its not possible to have it until 18. Also I know quite a few people that went through it and they all were really happy with the results (both mtf and ftm) its certainly a painful process and not to be taken lightly but for many people its still the right choice and very worth it. If your cousin really wants it, is aware of the risks then I think its very valid to support them in their choice
look man, as a trans person I’d say go for it, 90% of people say it’s the best decision they’ve ever made. the one thing I’d say is just be supportive, it can be hard but trans people can get super defensive and sort of hostile because we have so many people being ass holes all the time it’s easy to perceive people as being hostile towards us. and try and defend ourselves. just try and be supportive of their transition, especially if they decide to go through with top surgery
Ask them if there’s a dick enlargement surgery,not for me ofc
Yeah you should support. Though I don’t think bottom surgery is done at 15. Top surgery is done very rarely. Either way they don’t have to get it in the current second, just wait a few years.
i think bottom surgery might be to wait, BUT if this person really wants it i would trust them, especially if its top surgery. however i would completely support them taking hormones (im currently in uni for biotechnology, and so please trust me when i say that hormones are extremely safe when taken correctly. things like puberty blockers were designed ages ago for literal 10 year olds, and the technology has only gotten better.)
although, the regret rate for trans surgery is LOWER than knee surgery, or fucking hip replacements (that is, people who get trans surgeries are more likely to say “yeah this was the right decision” than people who got their knees fixed by surgery or people who got hip replacements)
Only top surgery can happen for under 18s. No one can have bottom surgery as a minor
My boyfriend got breast reduction surgery when he was 16, idk what people are talking about with it not being allowed while you’re under 18 lol. I do know that there are a lot of prerequisites like being on hormones for an extended period of time so I feel like they probably haven’t gone through enough puberty before their transition to justify going through the surgery even if they qualify for it (I think the required time is 2 years on hormones but I may be wrong)
I don’t believe that’s even possible, no doctor would operate on a 15 year old anyways even if it was legal in your country. And the surgery’s not something you can just get, it costs thousands and there’s just no way a 15 year old could get that kind of money.
Are they on hormones? Socially transitioned? Legal name change? There are lots of steps you can take towards transition without going immediately into a risky and expensive surgery.
As a trans girl, even if I had the money and a doctor to get srs or anything else I still wouldn’t despite how much I would want to do it, I’d rather save for the future and wait until I’m far enough in my transition to persue any surgery.
What I personally think you should do is support anything she wants to do wholeheartedly but make sure she’s informed on what she’s doing, although I don’t think it’s even possible anyways
A 15 YEAR OLD??!!
as far as im aware, minors cant have gender affirming surgery until theyre an adult, so they probably meant they wanna have it in the future. rn ur cousin probably wants hormone blockers, which only pause puberty and dont do anything that cant be reversed
They aren’t going to do sex reassignment surgery on a minor. At that age, the most a doctor will do is top surgery. I suggest he tries hormone blockers and/or testosterone until he’s able to have proper surgery, because it’s also insanely expensive and the waitlists are often pretty long!
Yes these surgeries are life changing, but a lot of people assume most people will regret them when that really isn’t the case. There is some regret rate as with any surgery and there is reason to wait till a more mature age. However, from the perspective of the trans person, they are in the wrong body, and it is *really* uncomfortable for them.
It’s almost impossible to get a surgery like this under 18, though there have been a few cases of breast augmentation for ftm 16/17 year olds. Try of thinking if you were the opposite gender physically, but still mentally whatever your current gender is. It might be fun for maybe a day but if you wanted to live life as the gender you are mentally you would be met with a lot of challenges. It’s difficult to convey what being trans is like to people who aren’t trans and daily life is a struggle when your physical characteristics cause people to treat you like the gender you aren’t in your head.
I would wait till 18, but be supportive. Like i said earlier it’s almost impossible to get these surgeries under 18 unless if it is in specific circumstances where a therapist, other doctor, and parent all agree to it.
No
15? That seems too young
15 is a big no-no. I believe that gender affirming surgeries, or any kind of cosmetic or appearance based surgeries unless absolutely necessary should be illegal ok until the person is like, at LEAST 25-30. Your brain doesn’t actually stop developing for so long that it’s better to make sure it’s something you actually want. Cause once it’s done there’s no going back
I think they meant gender affirming care, ie hormones, which you should support. I don’t know anywhere where you can get surgery at 15.
Yes, the person is me. Had top surgery done 2 months ago, best thing I’ve ever done for myself. Generally speaking I don’t think it’s wrong at all to support them in their decision, but chances are they won’t be able to go through with the surgery until many therapy appointments later, in some countries you HAVE to wait until you’re 18 as well. Personally I knew I’ve wanted top surgery, or at least wanted to be flat, sinceI was 13, I’m 19 now. You can 1000% know and be sure of it before you’re a legal adult. Support them for what it’s worth, in the end they’ll know what’s best for them more than anyone else.
They’ll grow out of the phase
Definitely wait until they’re an adult. I’ve seen videos of trans people and former trans people crying in regret because they got the surgery young and changed their minds. This is something that you can NEVER reverse. Wait until adulthood because teenage hormones be so emotionally destabilizing and I don’t think you can be trusted to make such a life changing decision. That’s why parents have legal authority until a kid is 18, to stop them from making impulsive decisions that can ruin their lives.
As an Orthodox Christian I’m against the entire thing, as a human being I think your cousin should take a couple steps and wait until they’re older. For starters I think therapy would be extremely beneficial. Your cousin is 15. Im a cis white dude and not even I knew who the hell I was when I was 15. Therapy could help your cousin unpack a lot of stuff that I’m sure they’ve been too afraid to open up about or just aren’t mentally mature enough to evaluate and understand themselves.
As for the surgery: again, your cousin is 15 years old. They may seem very adamant about it now, but as I said before they’re in a very weird place right now and there’s still so much for them to learn about themselves before they make a completely life-altering, irreversible, and overall risky decision like that.
Maturity/mental stuff aside, this form of surgery for both males and females is still incredibly experimental. It’s constantly evolving and the outcomes of the surgery are continuing to improve, but at the end of the day this type of surgery is still very very new. By waiting, not only will your cousin be able to really mentally mature and evaluate themselves, but will also give time for this type of surgery to advance, which, in the case they do decide to get it, will have much better results for them physically and mentally that will last for the rest of their life.
As for whether or not to support your cousin, I would support them. This doesn’t mean push them in one direction or the other, but rather be there as a safety net to fall back on and to make sure they’re making physically and mentally healthy decisions.
Unncle’s right
Hello! Trans person here! It is incredibly unlikely for a doctor to actually allow a 15 year old to get surgeries. The most your cousin would be able to get right now is puberty blockers and/or HRT. The important thing is that you let your cousin know that you support them. Coming out as trans is a scary and difficult process, and having someone in your corner can really make all the difference.
Not that young. There’s a reason why you should only start taking hormones when you’re 16 at the youngest. Surgery is 18 at the youngest. I’d recommend 25 or so though because that’s the age the brain finishes developing fully.