Feeling Lost and Unhappy at 27? Struggling with Career, Relationships, and Self-Love?
Are you a 27-year-old engineer in the UK feeling stuck in a career you no longer enjoy, grappling with loneliness, and seeking a meaningful relationship?
Here are some key points:
Career Dilemma:
– Not satisfied with your engineering career
– Want a high-flying career but unsure how to change paths after obtaining a master’s degree
Relationship Struggles:
– Feeling lonely and craving a partner
– Frustrated with dating experiences with individuals whose lifestyles clash with yours
Self-Reflection:
– Disliking yourself and your current situation
– Desiring change but feeling lost and uncertain about next steps
If you can relate to these challenges, follow along as we explore solutions and options to navigate through this difficult stage in your life. Let’s uncover ways to find fulfillment, make positive changes, and rediscover self-love and happiness. #careeradvice #relationshipstruggles #mentalhealth #selfreflection #personaldevelopment
I can relate to the no sex part. 26 years here. Only had sex twice in my life. Broke my virginity with a sex worker. Never been in a serious relationship. Currently unemployed too. It sucks but we have to keep at it. Don’t be afraid to start afresh. Things might take time but hopefully one day it pays off.
maybe u r too superficial when it comes to women? Just a guess
Why do you hate who you are? Because we are living in such an empty society? Where did you meet these girls? In Tinder? Maybe it’s not a good place to meet people. Look, you are not alone. There are so many women and men thinking and feeling like you do. Don’t let the superficial people hate yourself.
Also, do you hate your career? Or maybe you just hate your actual job? Maybe there are other options around your engineer career that you may like. Or maybe you need a time focusing on yourself or just working in a different job.
But really, don’t let superficial people let you feel that you are the one who is wrong or too much sensitive. I am feeling like this also but you are not alone.
If every date you’ve been with has an OF who does drugs and booze, I’m not sure if they are the problem or rather it’s your choice of date/methodology of finding dates…
If you’re not ready to switch careers fully maybe you can pick up something part-time for additional income. That might be better than committing to something else that you may not like. As far as dates, you’re definitely picking people you aren’t compatible with. There’s more women without onlyfans than there are with it lol. Maybe you need a hobby too, where you can make friends, connect on your values, and find a partner. For example, a running club, rock climbing, tennis, maybe some volunteering too. Therapy is also never a bad thing to identify roots of the self-hate and to get better overall.
You are still way too young to concern. I am 37 and still exploring myself/desires/happiness. Just try to let it go and enjoy! Cuz you have no guarantee to see next sun rise 🙂
If you’re starting to hate yourself, you need to separate yourself from the direction you’re going in.
It’s not for everyone, but I’ve always found that spending time in silence is helpful. There’s so much noise – so many people telling you what you should be (and there always will be). But it seems like there are things that aren’t lining up with you – the A1 in your own life.
If you love fitness, go to the gym.
If you think work isn’t paying enough, spend time finding something you actually enjoy. Even if the pay isn’t enough, it never was and it seems you’re unhappy with the work anyway.
I think all I’m really trying to advise is that you spend time with yourself, and not the noise, again. There’s a lot to find there.
The relationships and intimacy will come in the right way when you find that person again.
Sending all my best!
Don’t hate yourself. There are lots of things to do w/ an engineering degree. You can become a patent agent. I’m not sure what the requirements are in the uk for that but in the USA someone with a science degree can practice “patent law” by taking the patent exam. Or you maybe can switch to a different area of engineering depending on the job market where you are and your interests. It’s best to do something you love and hopefully that will pay you well.
With respect to the girls you find, try and find girls in a different setting. It may sound boring but maybe at a gym, book club, other activities. That way you may meet girls with similar interests. Here in the USA there are singles groups that do activities together where unattached singles do things together. Of course one can end up dating on of the unattached singles if one hits it off w/ them.
i think the post is faked up. the description is full of stereotype and exaggerated.
Just try and reinvent yourself.. change is inevitable after all.. embrace it
Stop replying to this pathetic, mentally ill troll.
You keep making choices that go against what you want. Stop doing that. It’s okay to not like what is mainstream, it’s okay to not live up to other people’s expectations of you. What’s not okay is to choose a life you don’t want and then complain about it. You’re young, you have time. I’m 30 and I’m just now deciding what I want to do with my life. There’s no rush man, chill.
If your an engineer. Look into Green Skills Bootcamp.
I got all my GWO (offshore wind turbine) tickets through a government funded scheme. You need a background in engineering either electrical/mechanical or hydraulic.
It’s normal to be 27 and still be figuring out your life. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Live within your means, it’s OK to live modest and save what you can. Staying sober is very admirable and I think you will eventually meet someone who is similar and more your speed. Which will be worth it. It sounds like you are proud of yourself and are overall healthy, as you should be proud and be thankful for your health. You want to better yourself which is very healthy. Focus on the things you can improve and don’t dwell on the things you can’t right now, try to enjoy the time in between my friend.
Seek out good company that’s compassionate and intelligent 🤓!! Seek outside your comfort zone!
Try getting back to USA to experience a true business person with a perspective towards community and personal attention towards mankind… THE LEGENDARY MAN AT YOUR IOWA CITY WENDY’S!!
Think about someone you respect. How do they spend their day. How do they treat themselves and other people. What are their values.
Now consider someone you don’t like. How do they behave, treat themselves, others, etc
You don’t like yourself for the same reasons you don’t like some other people. You can like yourself if you start acting like a person you would like.
I think everyone feels this in their 20’s. You’re not alone
If you are open toa move, engineers get paid quite a lot more in the US to my knowledge. You’d have to weigh that against cost of living, but when I dated an engineer in the UK, I was shocked at the absolute shit pay he made. I’m sure there are other countries who similarly value their engineers if the US isn’t to your liking.
If the problem is you just don’t enjoy engineering as a career, then it’s time to consider what transferable skills you have.
As for dating, it sounds like you need to use a different platform or learn how to spot red flags in their profile. Make better, more deliberate choices!
Change the place change the luck! I’d look to move to a different country or city and start fresh. Apply for jobs out of your comfort area.
You shouldn’t hate yourself. You’re doing pretty good overall. As far as dating goes, maybe try to find a woman at the gym so your goals and values align better.
You are not the first British engineer who has said something similar to me. The last guy was very sad because he had his degree and everything, but he was making more as a bartender.
The only option is for you to move abroad where they appreciate engineers. Germany, Austria, Switzerland, the Netherlands are all good options and they really had a high demand for highly educated engineers. You can also check out the Arabian gulf state where they are doing a lot of construction, and since you aren’t into partying and all that Saudi Arabia or Qatar might be a good option too. If you want to be with a more international crowd and with people you can date go to Dubai, where foreigners make up 90% of the population.
Can you diverse within engineering ?
– software, mechanical , chemical engineering
You’re very young with lots of time to take steps in a different direction. Be patient above all else and start planning some changes. You’re young, be patient.
Career-wise, engineering is a good stepping stone to many other jobs. Consulting, for instance. Lots of infrastructure projects around the world needing consultants. Once on that path, aim for management roles long term. By the time you are 50, you could be billing into the upper 100s per hour, flying first class everywhere and often and sending emails like “Let’s do it” from your smartphone. Or, you might hate it, I’m not your boss.
Success takes time.
At 27 I was single making a lousy wage at a really hard job where I wasn’t appreciated.
Then I found a wonderful spouse. Then I had some success at work. Then some more. Then some more. I had some success in investing. Then some more. Etc. Eventually I got where I wanted to be with a wonderful family and comfortably financially independent.
So all I can say is have patience and stay the course.
Move to another country. UK doesn’t have the best culture out of similar western countries.
Try to get a remote job or transition to consulting/sales within the same industry. Salespersons with engineering backgrounds have a big advantage selling products relating to that background. Will mostly pay better and likely be remote.
Then move to another county. Within Europe, Spain and maybe Greece are good options. Portugal isn’t bad either.
Outside of Europe, Thailand, Indonesia and Mexico are good options.
One country that is a hidden gem is Paraguay. Amazing food, 0% taxes on foreign sourced income, easy to get residency that turns permanent in 2 years, beautiful women who are traditional, extremely affordable, you can live on $800 easy. With north of $1000 you’re considered a rich foreigner that women will be super interested in.
Learn a high intensity sport/martial art. The more you struggle/suffer(physically) in order to upskill, the more you’ll feel you have a purpose in life and your brain will reward you with the right chemicals.
I’m starting to think everyone in this sub needs some talk therapy and not career advise.
If you want more money, apply for another job elsewhere. You might have to move. Make sure the job has better conditions (benefits, working conditions, room for growth, lower cost of living, closer commute, etc.) than the job you have now.
When you don’t like who you are, you attract negative people. Start doing nice, kind things for yourself. Spend time in nature. Buy clothes that you feel good wearing. Treat yourself to a massage. Listen to positive music. Watch happy movies and shows. Get enough sunshine during the day. Perhaps go to counseling.
When dating, improve upon the one before. Don’t keep dating a type. You say your last two dates were beautiful but had Only Fans, were too wild, and would get trashed. It sounds like you met those women at the same type of place. So, for your next date, look for someone who is beautiful, but is calmer, doesn’t use drugs and alcohol, has a different profession, and is into fitness like you. Go to places where that type of woman would be. An exercise class maybe. A race. A sporting club. Also, you might even know that woman now, but she won’t approach you when you’re dating wild types because she won’t think you’re serious and want to settle down.
Improve upon the one before works for both work and dating. You keep trying until you find the right fit. You’ll find what and who you’re looking for. Take care and good luck!
lay off the drugs and booze and start doing something postive for yourself and others around you. Find better ways of meeting women.