#SupportingFriends #TraumaRecovery #MentalHealthSupport
As a 19-year-old male wanting to help a friend who has been through such traumatic experiences, it’s important to approach the situation with sensitivity and understanding. While you may not have all the answers, there are steps you can take to support your friend through this difficult time.
Understanding Trauma and Its Effects
Trauma, especially of the nature your friend has experienced, can have long-lasting and severe effects on an individual’s mental and emotional well-being. It’s crucial to recognize the impact of her experiences and the challenges she may face in the aftermath.
Here are some recognizable effects of trauma that your friend may be experiencing:
– Panic attacks
– Severe headaches
– Nightmares
– Emotional distress
– Difficulty in trusting others
– Feelings of isolation and loneliness
Listening and Empathizing
One of the most important things you can do to help your friend is to simply be there for her. Actively listen to her without judgment, and provide a safe space for her to express her emotions and experiences. Validation of her feelings and experiences is crucial in her healing process.
It’s important to let her know that her feelings are valid, and she is not alone in her struggle. Encourage her to talk about her feelings and experiences, but don’t pressure her to share more than she is comfortable with.
Encouraging Professional Help
Although your friend may be resistant to seeking therapy, it’s essential to gently encourage her to consider professional help. Therapy can provide her with the tools and support she needs to process her trauma and develop coping mechanisms for her panic attacks and headaches.
Here are some ways you can encourage your friend to seek therapy:
– Offer to research and provide her with information about therapy options
– Accompany her to therapy sessions if she feels anxious about going alone
– Remind her that seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness, but a brave step towards healing
Creating a Safe and Supportive Environment
In addition to seeking professional help, creating a safe and supportive environment for your friend is crucial in her healing process. This can include involving trusted adults or authorities to hold her cousin accountable for his actions and ensuring that her parents provide her with the love and support she deserves.
Here’s how you can help create a safe environment for your friend:
– Offer to accompany her when she feels unsafe or anxious
– Encourage her to seek legal support to hold her cousin accountable for his actions
– Advocate for her with her parents, and help them understand the severity of her trauma and the importance of their support
Supporting Her Goals and Aspirations
Your friend’s determination to become a lawyer is a testament to her strength and resilience. Encourage her to pursue her goals and aspirations, and support her in any way you can. You can help her with her studies, offer to be a study buddy, or assist her in researching law schools and career paths.
Remind her of her strengths and capabilities, and celebrate her achievements, no matter how small they may seem. Knowing that she has a friend who believes in her can provide her with the motivation and inspiration she needs to continue moving forward.
Self-Care and Boundaries
It’s important to prioritize your own well-being while supporting your friend through her trauma. Witnessing a friend’s suffering can take a toll on your own mental and emotional health, so be sure to establish healthy boundaries and seek support for yourself if needed.
Here are some ways to practice self-care while supporting your friend:
– Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation
– Talk to a trusted adult or therapist about your own feelings and experiences
– Set boundaries with your friend to ensure you are not overwhelmed by the situation
In conclusion, supporting a friend who has experienced trauma requires patience, empathy, and understanding. By actively listening, encouraging professional help, creating a safe environment, supporting her goals, and practicing self-care, you can provide the support and love she needs to heal and thrive. Remember, you may not have all the answers, but your presence and compassion can make a world of difference in her journey towards recovery.
Leave her alone shes not your responsibility and you dont want her to be your responsibility
If she doesn’t want therapy realistically there is nothing that is going to change. She needs professional help. Not much you can do other than try to convince her to go to therapy
She needs trauma work which is something that a professional can do. But having said that you can just be a good friend. It won’t ‘fix’ her or anything but we all need a good friend. Pushing her to do therapy might just ruin your friendship. Sometimes with advice for self help you have to really pick your moments to bring it up or support them when they decide its time to do it.
There are lots of good treatments for trauma, if you want to learn more about trauma and treatments I recommend ‘The Body Keeps the Score’ by Bessel van der Kock (sp). One of the treatment options listen can be done, to a small extent, by yourself (Internal Family Systems) but if she doesn’t want therapy then she probably isn’t going to do that anyway.
Shes not gonna fuck you bro.
you seem like a good kid and i know its hard to see friends going through that as someone with 3 sisters its especially difficult to see a female friend suffering the way she is
the truth of the matter is that this is a very very rocky and dangerous road for you, all you want to do is help but all you can really do is keep her distracted and give her the space where she can forget it all for a few minutes whether it be a movie or a hobby
be very careful as you will take on her stress as your own and at times it will be very painful
also if one of you catches feelings it will make it ten times more difficult especially if you both do
idk what youve been through but traumabonds almost never work out granted they will be a better person because of you things will get better for her and sometimes that may leave you in the dark
What happened to her cousin? Is there no possibility to put him in prison?
As people said she needs to get therapy and professional help. Other than that she may get her life back by taking real steps. She may apply for a university or a new scholarship. Changing her place and the people around her may actually help .
Usually receiving psychological treatment will make them feel that they are sick. If she feels this way, it will make her feel that the problem lies with herself. However, a large part of mental illness is due to the harm caused to her by others. They may feel that others are at fault. You have to bear it yourself.
The biggest problem is – I’m not sick!
She probably doesn’t want to recall that traumatic past either.
You can tell her that you really care and worry about her, and tell her not to go to a psychiatrist but to a psychological counselor. Psychological counselors, like lawyers, are there to help others.
Tell her that you will go with her and she can stop at any time if she feels uncomfortable during the process. You will be with her. She will have no record and she will not need to take medicine. They will give her some psychological or legal support. Suggestions and assistance.
lmao you can fix her bro
She is your friend and I don’t care what anybody says if YOU TRULY WANTS TO HELP HER just be there for her, if you are actually attracted to her don’t not hesitate and take her with you away from all the trash she’s been around. Act out the best thing this women can ever imagine who has A$$hols parents, raped by her cousins, brother died, trauma after trauma, become the best thing this women can dream of
Hi. I can’t provide you with an actual answer since I’m just a teen myself, but I wanted to drop by and tell you that you’re an amazing person. Not many Indian guys would be willing to genuinely help their female friends (atleast from my experience as an Indian girl). I’m not even religious but may God bless you 🙂
Accha hai bhai tu
Well, all she can do now is suppress those feelings and memories untill they show up again which is probably a bad idea. You can only be there for her when she needs you.
Dont let her choices and wellbeing be something to blame yourself for. Ive been there and it kills you after which you cant do anything at all for her anymore. Then that will eat you up from the inside out. Your mental health is just as important as hers!
The best of luck to the both of you and stay strong mate!
Hugs, blankets and water.
And if possible, convincing her to go to therapy. Offer to go with her.
> She doesn’t want to go to therapy.
She will have to reconsider this, nothing else will come close to helping.
The best would be therapy, but if she doesn’t want to go, then I believe it would be helpful for you to be there for her. A good friend is something we all need. Don’t be weird, and be there for her. Speak the truth when needed and sugarcoat the truth when needed too. Offer your time but let her have hers without you too.
That said, since YOU want to help, then you could study and become a therapist yourself. Maybe then she’d open up and try to resolve her issues with a professional (you). It’d be a great career and one which you began with purpose, which is a wonderful thing. It might ruin your friendship as you know it now, but you’d help her very much.
She probably doesn’t want to go to therapy cause she feels like that’ll mean there’s something “wrong” with her.
Try and reframe it she isn’t broken she’s just hurt by the actions of someone else, if someone stabbed you, you’d go to the hospital right?
It’s not your fault you got stabbed your not weak cause you got stabbed. Same thing with mental health
I’m very sorry to hear that. Offering support is very important for her well being. If she doesn’t want to go to therapy don’t force her maybe she isn’t comfortable with it.
Look… you can _try_ to help, and that’s only by leading her to therapy, if possible.
As much as you like her (in whatever way), her story and burdens _are not yours_ and it’s very easy to ger caught up in someone else’s problems.
Like other poeple have replied with.
She needs professional help and you can’t force it on her.
The other problem with getting professional help though, it’s about finding the right person for her to talk. It might not happen right away but maybe way later that she finally finds a professional she can “vibe” with that will help her.
I’m speaking from experience, don’t do what I did and had to be forced to finally get help, so instead of finding the right person within months it took me years because I was stubborn.
She can bottle it up as long as she think she can but it will eventually explode, there’s only so much a person can handle.
All you can do is be supportive and convince her to get the help, and keep looking for the right one if it doesn’t work out straight away. If she’s already suffering so much from PTSD imagine what it will be like when she’s going through her law degree, the added stress will make things worst. Also, she needs to be removed from her family since they are not helping at all. If she lives with them, get her to move out soon as possible.
Sounds like all she needs is a good dickin’. She’ll get right over cousin.