#CareerStruggles #PromotionStress #OfficeWoes #MentalHealthMatters #KeepPushingForward
Are you feeling stuck in your career, watching your colleagues get promoted while you’re left behind? It’s a tough situation to be in, especially when you know you’ve been doing great work. The feelings of disappointment, frustration, and self-doubt can take a toll on your mental well-being. But remember, you’re not alone in this struggle, and there are practical ways to cope with the situation.
Acknowledge Your Feelings
It’s important to recognize and validate your emotions. Feeling overlooked or undervalued at work is a legitimate concern, and it’s okay to feel upset about it. Allow yourself to experience these emotions without judgment.
Seek Clarity and Feedback
Initiate a candid conversation with your supervisor to understand the reasons behind not being promoted. Request constructive feedback on your performance and areas for improvement. This feedback can provide valuable insights and help you work towards your career goals.
Focus on Self-Reflection and Growth
Take this setback as an opportunity for personal and professional development. Identify your strengths and weaknesses, set realistic goals, and invest in upgrading your skills. Continuous learning and self-improvement can boost your confidence and make you a more competitive candidate for future opportunities.
Explore New Opportunities
If you feel stagnant in your current role, don’t hesitate to explore other career options. Update your resume, network with professionals in your field, and consider applying for positions that align with your career aspirations. Embrace change as a chance for growth and new challenges.
Practice Self-Care and Well-Being
Amidst career disappointments, prioritizing your mental health is crucial. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercising, meditating, or spending time with loved ones. Seek support from friends, family, or a professional counselor if you’re struggling to cope with the emotions.
Stay Positive and Stay Motivated
Remember that setbacks are not permanent, and your worth is not defined by a job title. Stay resilient, stay motivated, and stay focused on your long-term career goals. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small, and keep pushing forward with determination and positivity.
You are capable, you are talented, and you are deserving of success. Don’t let a temporary setback derail your career aspirations. Stay strong, stay focused, and believe in your potential to overcome challenges and thrive in your professional journey. Your promotion may be delayed, but your growth and resilience are unstoppable. #NeverGiveUp #CareerGrowth #YouGotThis.
I promote myself to a different company.
Unfortunately promotions are base on a lot more than effort and good work. Its political and if you dont kiss uo to right people or show your face than it aint happening. I gave up on this a while ago.
I was passed over for a legitimate raise once in my career and not even considered for a promotion I thought I deserved once in my career. Both times I found a new job as soon as I could. Only thing I would add is if you never ask you’re not going to receive, so if you like your job but just haven’t asked for the raise/promotion then that part is on you.
The thing that gets people promoted is, I hate to say it: “positive energy.” I fucking hate it, but there it is. That’s the lesson I learned in like 15 years of this shit.
If you’re “negative” or even “neutral” in the eyes of your higher ups, you will get passed over in favor of “positive” people who may not do as good of a job as you. They will put the positive people who can do less in power, and keep the actually skilled at the lower levels to do the work.
Keep in mind that what constitutes “negative” may not be obvious. Even if you do a stellar job, but they don’t see you as “ambitious,” boom, filed into the negative bucket. It’s sad that it is that way, but managers and shit have so much going on, they’re not looking at the grey and spending time considering this is great detail. If they got “stellar work but quiet and reserved” person A versus “dashing smile with gushing positivity that seems genuine but can’t tie their shoes” person B, there’s little thought to it: you bad, they good.
This is why you hear stuff like that corporate is an extension of high school. Because it absolutely is. 1000%. Even physical image matters.
So, what you have to do is one of three things:
1) play the game.
2) quit the game.
3) accept it.
Those are your only three realistic options. If you’re crazy ambitious you could try your hand at a 4th option of “change the game” by starting your own company and just putting yourself at the top, but that’s another story.
I quit and took time off. During this time I got my next job lined up, and got myself prepared. I literally got new stylish clothes, a good haircut, I practiced being “overly nice but not disingenuous”, worked mentally to do stuff like “always assume the other side is acting in good faith and not trying to screw you,” developed skills like mental compartmentalization to drop things rather than ruminate about them, and so on and so on. Some people do all this shit naturally. I don’t. But it has worked well.
1. Apply for positions internally.
2. Talk to management. Ask what you need to do for a promotion. State you’re interested.
3. Ask about raises. Provide a reason why they want to keep you by providing accomplishments
4. Make a list of accomplishments. Keep it updated over time.
5. See if they pay for education or certifications. Advance yourself.
6. Update the resume and apply. See what’s out there. Practice interviews. People normally job hop to get more money.
First, I don’t keep telling myself stories because that can easily take me down a dark path of depression. Instead, I just pluntly communicate my disappointment with my manager and ask the questions. See what they have to say.
Second, I’d have already filed multiple applications and reached out to my network on the same day I learned I am not getting a promotion or raise.
Look for other work.
People don’t get promotions because they are really good at their current job. It’s more likely that you’ll get promoted if you don’t excel. This is when you demand higher pay then leave if they say no. Welcome to modern capitalism
I channeled my anger into getting a new job with a union, so unless something absolutely major happens I know exactly what I’ll be making and what my raises will be for the foreseeable future.
Promotions aren’t worth the effort anymore. I’ve made more taking lateral moves to new companies than staying and getting promoted.
I was in your position, being the top performer on the team for 3 consecutive quarters yet I was told that the bar for the senior position is really high and I was not good enough.
Honestly when the news came out all my teammates and everyone on the other team was upset but I was not too sad about it. I just continued to do what I do best and at the same time I was open to opportunities. A month later I was headhunted for a senior role in another company and of course I accepted the offer. Funny enough when I resigned my manager asked what could they do to keep me? The ship has sailed
You may unknowingly be in the position of the “golden handcuffs” wherein your skills, knowledge of processes/systems, experience and speed in your current role are at that point where it would be harder or more “troublesome” to try and replace if they were to promote you.
First, consider individual therapy. If your disappointment at not receiving a promotion becomes all consuming, you have a broader problem to address. Life doesn’t always give us what we wish, being able to deal with those disappointments is an important life skill.
Second, evaluate how you are working and interacting with others. Great marks in your current role doesn’t mean you are displaying the attributes others believe are necessary to be successful in a new role.
Third, comparing yourself to others is the enemy of happiness. Leave that part out of your thinking. I am not saying you should be satisfied with the situation— but rather focus on you, not others, in that.
Fourth, at least dip your toe in the water. See what else is out there.
Finally, there are a few items within your post to consider. You feel disrespected and are pulling back from your job — yet you have already given up on your job search. You say you have become extremely sensitive to feedback at work; this suggests that not everything is excellent. Working with others, and the ability to work in a team, is an important soft skill. Consider working on your soft skills.
I got a promotion once but no raise because of “Covid”. Still looks good on the resume at least.
CONFUSED BY YOUR STATEMENT
are you planning on retiring at this one company?
No
What’s the big deal, get another job
Leave. Seek a promoted role at a competitor and exceed expectations.
Yeah this happened to me. I left and went to another company (my “rebound” job) and from there got hired into a WAY higher position than the one I’d been originally passed up on. If you hit a brick wall it’s time to move on.
This happened to me at my last job. I had as good of a performance review as any of my peers and I didn’t get promoted and they did. Found out it was based on my professional development progress outside of work, which I was behind on compared with most of my peers because I’m a parent of two and they were all single 20 something year olds with no outside responsibilities. I left within a month and found a role that paid more than I could have made even if I was promoted at the last company. Just remember that loyalty to a company is hardly ever advantageous these days. I’m now on year five with the company I moved to and am starting to look for something new as my work is boring and the pay has stopped climbing even though the company is making record profits every year… 🙄
I won’t pretend this is applicable to every job in the world, but when my former employer refused to give me the management position that I knew I deserved, I left them to drown. I was known as the hardest working and most knowledgeable employee, frequently even trained managers in procedures they needed to know. I prevented so much loss and was basically managing from an entry level position while only make about $1/hour more than anyone else with my same job and had to beg for hours so I could get by. I learned that they wouldn’t promote me because they knew that they couldn’t. If I wasn’t in that position and helping us maintain goals, they would also suffer the consequences.
I saw a quote somewhere that went something like “being irreplaceable also means being unpromotable” and if shifted something in me. Seeing so many people around me get the promotions they wanted while being so mediocre. It sucked because I genuinely loved my job! In my opinion, I had no choice other than leaving. Now I make more money for less work, steady hours, better work-life balance, and without immense corporate pressure! Blessing in disguise, I guess.
1. Promotions are not typically handed out for just good performance. Are you applying for open higher pay grade roles? Have you discussed your career goals with your manager and what you have to do to reach them at this company? You need to take an active approach to this, it will not just be handed to you because you had a good performance review.
2. Does your company not provide at least a coat of living salary raise? If you were scored highly on your review, you should get that at minimum (but should be more imo). If they do not offer incentives to perform at a high level, stop doing it. Just do what you’re paid to do and look for a new job in the meantime. I certainly wouldn’t want to work for a company that does not provide raises or bonuses for high performance.
Promote yourself by leaving to new company with a higher pay amount. Job hopping will beat out any internal promotion always
In the same boat as you so I’ve been looking at other opportunities. Looks like I’ll get an offer this week and I feel like I have to take it even though I’m not 100% sold on it.
You leave.
Some companies have all sorts of dumb reasons that they don’t promote their best people and they deserve to lose them. From HR’s perspective, they can’t just promote everyone every year because they don’t have the slots open or the money to do so. So, they set a quota, or set rules like “no more than once every three years” or whatever it may be.
There’s a cost to that, though. If you fail to promote and give raises to your best employees, they tend to find those things with other companies. It’s a risk that HR is willing (or is forced to) take.
If you don’t feel satisfied with your pay or role, you should consider looking elsewhere to improve them. If your HR team asks for an exit interview when you notify them of your resignation, you should tell them as much: it’s their job to take steps to retain the employees they wish to keep with promotions and compensation, and they failed to do so.
Incidentally, don’t take any this personally as some sort of referendum on your personal worth. Your employer wants their employees to maximally productive at the minimum cost possible in order to eke out the best profit. This is HR’s job, to manage you, rather impersonally, as a resource to get the best return on investment while they can.
Most upward mobility happens by moving to a new company.
I go and work for another company.