#MarriageProblems #RepetitiveQuestions #CuteComebacks #NewlywedLife
Hey there, newlywed! Dealing with repetitive questions from your spouse can be quite frustrating, but fear not – I’ve got some tips and tricks to help you handle this situation with grace and humor. It’s important to remember that this is likely just a harmless habit, and responding with love and understanding can make all the difference.
**Understanding the situation**
Before we jump into the fun comebacks, let’s take a moment to understand why your husband might be asking the same questions over and over again. It could be due to forgetfulness, anxiety, or simply a habit that he hasn’t been able to shake. Regardless of the reason, it’s clear that he isn’t doing it to intentionally annoy you.
**Cute comebacks to repetitive questions**
Now, onto the fun part! Here are some lighthearted and silly comebacks that you can use when faced with those repetitive questions:
1. *Bag is by the door*:
Husband: “You should go pack your suitcase.”
You: “Honey, I packed it so well that even Harry Potter couldn’t fit another sock in there! It’s waiting patiently by the door for our grand adventure.”
2. *Reminding you to go to bed*:
Husband: “Honey, it’s time to go to bed.”
You: “Yes, dear, I’m already tucked in and waiting for story time. Would you like to read me a bedtime story tonight?”
3. *Repeatedly asking who you’re playing in a game*:
Husband: “Who are we playing against?”
You: “Oh, it’s the team of mythical creatures and giants. I hear they’re quite formidable opponents.”
4. *Asking if you’re going to be okay*:
Husband: “Are you going to be okay if I go to the bathroom?”
You: “I’ll be fine, darling. The strategic bathroom mission is a go!”
5. *Reminding you to brush your teeth*:
Husband: “Don’t forget to brush your teeth.”
You: “Got it, chief! Operation Pearly Whites is a go.”
These lighthearted responses can bring a smile to both of your faces and add a touch of humor to the situation, making it more bearable for both of you.
**Advice from ancient wisdom**
In the Bhagavad Gita, it is mentioned that we should respond to challenging situations with love and compassion. While the repetitive questions can be frustrating, responding with understanding and warmth can make a significant difference in how you both handle the situation. Remember, it’s all about practicing patience and responding with love, even in the face of annoyance.
**Communicating with love**
In addition to using cute comebacks, it’s essential to communicate openly and lovingly with your husband about how the repetitive questions make you feel. Let him know that while you understand it’s a habit, it can be challenging for you at times. Together, you can work on finding ways to navigate this unique aspect of your relationship with understanding and humor.
Remember, marriage is a journey filled with moments of annoyance and laughter, and finding a balance between the two is what makes it all worthwhile. Keep the lines of communication open, respond with kindness, and don’t forget to sprinkle in a little humor along the way.
Wishing you an abundance of love and laughter in your marriage journey! 💖
Is it really a habit or is it some kind of a tick/neurodivergent thing? Else I was going to ask about early dementia but you said they all do it.
If we assume that it’s him having the worst short term memory ever, and he’s not doing it to annoy you, I think giving him completely random answers would be fun for you.
Husband:”Remember to brush your teeth.”
You:”The mayonnaise is in the cupboard”
Or
Husband:”Will you be OK if I do X?”
You:”All the dinosaurs in the park are female.”
If you’re lucky he might react to it and realise how often he repeats questions.
I’m not you, but omg that would annoy the hell out of me.
For #4; are you ok? You collapse onto a chaise lounge, wearing a silk robe and feathered slippers, hand to your brow and cry “I am but a poor, feeble minded woman; incapable of surviving on my own in the wild! How ever shall I go on without you?!” A sofa and fluffy bath robe will also do for this in a pinch.
For #6; remember to brush your teeth… “teeth? What on earth… say that again…?! Teeth you say?? What are those???” And when he explains what teeth are (hopefully tapping his own teeth) you go full dentist, peering into his mouth and say “fascinating!! So that’s what those are!!
Alternative for #6; you will need an electric drill, those cleaning brushes that fit on a drill and a comically large set of fake teeth. Possibly several sets of fake teeth. And some safety goggles. When he says “remember to brush your teeth “ you go into industrial teeth cleaning mode.
Maybe it’s time to start mirroring his behavior. When he grows tired of it, “what? I thought this is how we were meant to communicate. This is how you talk at me, after all.”
Or:
Him: Pack your bags.
You: No.
Him: what?
You: I’ve packed my bags, why would I do it again?
Him: Will you be okay…?
You: I’m flying out to Kansas to see Dorothy. (Or some other nonsensical response.)
Him: What???
You: Of course I’ll be okay. I’m an adult.
If you don’t break this “communication” now, in 5 years (or less), it will be the reason for divorce.
‘His sister-in-law witnessed this and said all the men in the family do it. They don’t know why. It drives all of the women in the family crazy.’
Because they aren’t paying attention to what the women in their lives are saying
I’d just ignore it – answer the first time and then not respond after that. He doesn’t listen to you now, funny come backs aren’t going to help
I’d just say “okay, Mom.” Especially the teeth brushing thing…
That sounds exhausting.
You wanted that for the rest of your life?
What’s his excuse for constantly asking?
My mother used to do the same thing. Clearly she wasn’t right in the head. My personal opinion is that she suffered from some sort of autism + ocd + adhd combo. I sympathize. It’s beyond infuriating.
It sounds like ADHD + talking out loud about stuff + anxiety plus maybe just not encoding what is being said. that said, being probably more similar to your husband than not (57m ADHD) it is certainly not on purpose or malicious and humor is better than frustration to handle it. There may be some anxiety mixed into this, and he is not really doing anything than checking your mood to see if you are angry or frustrated with him. Anger and frustration will likely make him do it more.
I would come up with a silly comeback, that you can repeat in almost the exact way each time in a nice way…such as “I am in bed” “This is the bed” but use the same words each time. Eventually he will stop
That just sounds like he’s not listening to you. Sounds very frustrating and childish.
Answer the first time and ignore the repeats. If he continues, tell him you’ve already answered and aren’t going to repeat yourself.
How do you not hate him?
This doesn’t seem normal.
I think he needs to be screened for early onset Alzhemer’s disease.
Did you not live together prior to the marriage? How did you not just leave earlier?
You should sit your husband down and tell him you are very concerned about this. It could be caused by some health issue, may it be mental or physical. Ask him to see a doctor just to be sure, there could be a serious problem underneath, especially that every guy in the family does it, it seems to indicate it is hereditary.
Has he seen a psychiatrist? That’s a lot of forgetting to do.
Just say “my answer has not changed in the 10 minutes since you last asked me.”
Does he have OCD?
Repetition may be involuntary. If it’s a tic or a compulsion you don’t need to treat it like a conversation.
Since you say he doesn’t actually seem to need the information in your response (he can call it to mind if you ask), you can maybe just try an acknowledgement word like “yes” (“copy”, “hello”, “potato”) that soothes him and requires no mental energy from you.
In comments, you’ve said he knows you’ve answered already bc he can repeat what you told him. This is just willful torment. My suggestion: every successive time he asks you the same thing or reminds you unnecessarily, blow a whistle. I guarantee you he’ll stop in about a week. Seriously. You have to make him uncomfortable.
Are you me? Wait til his hearing goes and you have to repeat constantly. As far as repeating, they “hear” you but do not “listen”. If I have something urgent to tell my husband, I have to say look at me, listen. This is important. Otherwise he will swear I never told him about it.
We are all different. You just have to learn to work around it. Yeah, like everday…😏
– Remember to brush your teeth.
– I sold them to the pawn shop, remember?
– Who are we playing?
– Gryffindor.
– Honey it’s time to go to bed.
– But I already did three days ago!
– Are you going to be ok that I’m going to take a shower?
– Sure, as long as you put it back where you took it from.
This is all annoying but this specifically:
“he is always asking me if I’m going to be OK. Am I going to be OK that he’s going to the bathroom? Am I going to be OK that he’s leaving for work? Am I going to be OK that he’s going to take a shower? Am I going to be OK that he’s going to exercise?”
Would make me insane
This is next level.. I’d be getting him assessed at the neurologist. Honestly. I’m glad you are able to take it lightly, but this would get on my nerves so fast and also be a genuine cause of concern.
I would personally be doing it back to him (repeating the same question or sentence in response) to show him just how often he does it, and how annoying it is. He obviously is not aware if how frequent it is.
As a teen I used to use the word “like” a lot. In every sentence. “Like, the way that like, valley girls do.”
I had a bf who started saying “LIKE” loudly back to me, every time I said it. He was an abusive asshole, but I will say, him doing that made me aware of just how often it was a part of my speech, and it only took a couple weeks for me to cut it out.
I’d be coming up with one simple response (preferably one word) that you can declare loudly every time he does it. Its a waste of your time to continuously answer his actual statement (the bag is packed, i am in bed, etc) so I’d be saying something abrupt that stands out and also doesn’t answer his query because its useless.
That or just straight up not respond when he asks you a benign question.
I think this is too much of a drain on your mental energy as is, and clever responses aren’t going to help because he obviously doesn’t bother clocking whatever you say back to him anyway
I’d start talking to him about getting checked for dementia. In actuality this kind of repetition IS a symptom of it and my mom who has it has done it a ton.
Now you and I both know this isn’t the case with him in actuality, but if you approach this with “sincerity” and “seriousness” maybe he will buy a clue and stop this annoying habit. I would go through with actually nagging him to make an appointment with a doctor.
I’d start counting. So the second question I’d just say 2.
This is a definition of hell… a 56-yo toddler.
Are you sure he isn’t having early signs of dementia or hearing issues. This isn’t normal.
Sounds like either dementia or OCD. He should get checked out. The fact that all the men do it suggests a genetic component to me.
ETA: I’m also wondering if he’s talking to you or if he’s just talking to himself, reminding himself of what to do and you just happen to be in the room. This also happens with people with ADHD. They know that they often forget things so they overcompensate by checking over and over to make sure they’ve done it or having an internal dialogue reminding them. His dialogue could just be external and it just sounds directed at you.
Honestly I would not engage with this. If he knows he’s already asked it and knows the answer, it’s either some sort of tic or he’s the most annoying person on earth to be married to.
I would sit down and tell him that you understand this is a habit, but it’s INCREDIBLY annoying to you. You are going to have a hand signal that means, “We’ve already discussed this,” and each time he asks something repeatedly, you are simply going to hold up the hand signal and not acknowledge him in any other way. If he wants to socially engage with you, then he has to come up with something new to talk about. And then try really hard to come up with a hand signal that’s not just the middle finger.
Unless he has a memory condition, this is not cute or funny. He doesn’t listen. LOL
I would learn ***your*** most used phrases in other languages and say the same thing in 10 different ways. Then just shrug and walk away when he is confused. Maybe he will understand and grasp another language.
BTW, this would annoy the hell out of me. lol
I just keep a spray bottle full of water with you for a week or two, and spray him in the face each time he asked one of those questions. You can train a cat that way, you can train a husband too.
“No, I’m going to slip on a banana peel and die”
“Only if you buy me a pony first”
“I will on February 30th”
“Yes, but only because my future self time traveled back to 1978 to remind me”
” Where we’re going we don’t need roads!”
Lol you should just start quoting your favorite books/shows/movies.
Or you could practice learning/speaking a new language!