#TravelItaly #SoloTrip #RelationshipAdvice
So, you and your boyfriend had planned a 3-month trip to Italy, but things took an unexpected turn when he left after just one day. First and foremost, let me just say that I’m so sorry to hear about what happened. It’s completely understandable that you’re feeling lost and unsure about how to proceed with your trip without him. But don’t worry, I’m here to offer some advice and support as you navigate this difficult situation.
Navigating the Emotions 💔
It’s completely natural to feel a range of emotions after something like this happens. From shock and sadness to anger and confusion, allow yourself to feel whatever comes up. Remember, healing is not a linear process, so it’s okay to have good days and bad days. Take the time to process your feelings, and don’t rush yourself to “get over it” before you’re ready.
Rediscovering Yourself 🌟
Now that you’re on this trip alone, take this time to reconnect with yourself. Explore the beautiful city of Florence, indulge in local cuisine, and immerse yourself in the rich culture and history of Italy. Use this time to rediscover your own interests, passions, and dreams. This trip can still be a meaningful and transformative experience for you, even if it’s not what you initially imagined.
Practicing Self-Care 💆
Self-care is crucial during this time. Make sure to prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Consider indulging in activities that bring you joy, such as taking a leisurely walk through the streets of Florence, treating yourself to a spa day, or practicing yoga by the serene Tuscan countryside. Also, surround yourself with positivity – whether it’s through reading uplifting books, listening to inspiring podcasts, or engaging in deep conversations with locals.
Finding Support 🤗
Remember, you are not alone in this. Reach out to friends, family, or even seek online communities for support. Connecting with others who have gone through similar experiences can provide comfort and help you feel understood. It’s also a great way to make new connections and turn this into an opportunity to build lasting friendships.
Turning to Spirituality 🙏
The Bhagavad Gita teaches us many valuable life lessons, and it can provide guidance and clarity during challenging times. Reflect on the teachings of surrender, detachment, and finding inner peace amidst adversity. By embracing the wisdom from ancient texts, you may find a sense of purpose and direction as you navigate through this unexpected journey.
Moving Forward with Resilience 💪
Lastly, remember that you are stronger than you think. This experience may have shaken you, but it doesn’t define you. Take things one day at a time, and focus on the present moment. Use this trip as an opportunity to gain valuable insights about yourself and the world around you. Embrace the resilience within you, and with time, you will pick up the pieces and move forward with grace and strength.
In Conclusion:
You have the power to turn this unexpected turn of events into a life-changing experience. Embrace this solo trip as a chance to rediscover yourself, find meaning, and create beautiful memories. Trust that in time, you will overcome this obstacle and emerge even stronger. Stay positive, be kind to yourself, and allow this journey to unfold in its own beautiful way. You’ve got this! 🌺
Let me give you my personal anecdote to help put this guy’s toxicity into perspective. Just this past weekend my girlfriend was posting some pictures online for the new year. She didn’t post the picture we took or tag me, so I asked her why she hadn’t posted that one. Her response was a simple “I’m sorry, it wasn’t intentional, I just kept those pictures private. I’ll update my post right now and tag you.” I told her I wasn’t mad at her, I just wanted to make sure there wasn’t something bothering her. So to summarize: I brought up the issue, she took full responsibility for her mistake and made it right by me, and it was a quick 30 second interaction where neither of us got upset. She didn’t blow up, point fingers at me, or break up with me. Your boyfriend/ex is a toxic asshole and you’re much better off without him.
To “pick up the pieces” the first thing you do is cut this guy out of your life. Remove every last tie you have to him and then block his ass. Then use this once-in-a-lifetime trip as an opportunity to move on. You’re in a new, exciting place and you have no strings to tie you down. Make the most of this trip and explore yourself. Do whatever you want, whenever you want, and find what you want in life to make you happy.
EDIT: a lot of people are asking how it was “her mistake.” I replied to one comment already, here’s my response: We had discussed a few weeks ago about being a little more public in our relationship. That included posting some pictures of us together around the holidays/new year, which is why I brought it up when I saw she had posted other pics from that night but not the one we took. It wasn’t an accusation towards her, more just like a “why didn’t you post them and are you okay with posting them?” To which she was, so she edited her post to add them.
Have you two fought about social media before and has this been an ongoing issue? His reaction just seems so over the top, yelling at you and then leaving, where did he go? Did he already help pay for the AirBnBs?
Has he posted you to his socials before?
You’re on vacation. Pick up the pieces by doing all the fun things YOU want to do there. Not the things you necessarily planned together, but all the things that you probably wouldn’t have being with him.
Have fun, explore, get out into the world. That’s how you move on. Clearly he’s got something going on, but based on your comments about having to deescalate arguments, I think you’ll look back, probably pretty soon, and feel relief.
I feel like we’re missing a lot of context. I mean if he was this unstable to begin with, why date him? It feels like there’s more to the story.
If I’m wrong and there’s not, then don’t be confused, be happy that you dodged a very crazy bullet.
I’ll enjoy my stay in Italy and have summer fling with Italian men there. Im not gonna ruin my vacation for him if I were you.
People put way too much importance on social media. It really seems like something is missing here. It seems like he was looking for a reason to pick a fight. How sure are you that he went home?
It sucks right now but you’re vacation has nowhere to go but up. By the time you go home, you’ll be glad you stayed.
If your dog is barking at you, someone else is feeding it.
Honey, this is allowed to hurt. You have 3 months, you can take the time to grieve what you’ve lost. You can grieve the man you thought he was.
You should be incredibly proud of yourself for blocking him. Keep your chin up. A good therapist can help you recognize the behaviour that should have ended this relationship. He sounds incredibly immature and toxic. You deserve a soft life full of love and a partner who contributes meaningfully to that. You are worthy.
Be kind to yourself. Give your body what it asks for. Rest. Drink lots of fluids. Eat your favourite foods. Lean on your loved ones. I hope your days get easier soon. ❤️
He was looking for a reason to leave or had already decided he didn’t want to stay. I am sorry.
I’m so excited for future you when you realize you were much better off without this AH on your once in a lifetime trip!!
I know in the meantime it’ll feel hard and sad but as others have mentioned that is not a reasonable reaction at all!! At worst sounds like he’s hiding something/maybe pretending to be single, flirting and r already cheating. At best he’s just being a jerk for no reason!! Either way you will look back one day and think THANK GOODNESS I WASN’T stuck with this loser for such an amazing trip!
Best of luck and I hope you can get over the breakup quickly and enjoy your 3 months!!
>update: sorry, my post didn’t make it clear that he is now my ex. And I have gone no contact.
GOOD, that’s all we needed to know. Wish you the best OP. You deserve SO MUCH better.
Enjoy Italy in you newly single state! Go make some friends, eat good food and drink some wine for me
Well he missed out because Italy is an amazing country. In my opinion he did you a favor leaving the first day. You deserve better than a dude who can’t deal with his emotions in a healthy way. Enjoy your trip that guy doesn’t deserve letting it ruin your time with your family.
Girl! You have 3 months in freaking Italy! Screw him – go drink some wine and enjoy the ride!
I mean, you are a free woman in Italy!
I get it, breakups can be really sad and disorienting. But you are surrounded by art and wine and food and fashion. Treat yo self.
You Dodged one hell of a bullet there be happy it’s now and you didn’t waist all those days with him.
He was clearly keeping you a secret on social media… there’s usually a reason for that.
Take the months there to heal & keep your head up! Enjoy Italy & what it has to offer— you never know what is just around the corner…
Nice, now you have maybe 90kg less of baggage to carry with you 😁 Have fun, eat the amazing food, drink the amazing wine. He can go to hell
Read the title and felt sad for you, read the post and felt freaking relieved for you. Good riddance! This is going to be an AMAZING and epic trip that you will look back on for years, and the pain that earmarks the beginning will only make it more memorable and more clear how much you will transform and thrive in the weeks to come.
This is the start of an amazing romcom. Let yourself be sad for a little bit and then go enjoy Italy! Invite some friends to join you for pieces of it. You have an amazing opportunity. He doesn’t deserve another second of your time.
Spent so much time in Florence as a woman on my own. There is so much to do! Go to museums, drink wine in your apartment, make some nice food, go out for aperitivo, hang out at Santo Spirito, find the parties (there are loads). Have a ball. Forget his ass.
Stay positive and enjoy this trip to the fullest, he sounds so toxic. Hopefully this is just big eye opener and fresh start to the new year!
This is a blessing. I promise. Your ex is insane. Based on you not immediately realizing how insane his overreaction was, I’m going to assume he’s always been insane and you’ve been desensitized.
Block his number, enjoy your amazing trip (it will be way more fun without him) and find yourself a cute Italian boy or two to take your mind off this loser.
Seems like a you dodged a bullet. Lucky for you, Italy has some nice looking dudes
“He was going to”. Yeah right.
He has someone else and doesn’t want them or you to know.
Good riddance. The trash took itself out.
Good riddance. What a turd.
You’re there for 3 months. Take a week or whatever to get your head straight and then dive in for the rest of the trip.
Was this guy a toxic, weird baby-man? Maybe.
But it seems likely also that he was married, or had a girlfriend. He thought he could get away with this all, but realized he couldn’t, so pretended he was mad and just ended it.
What you do is enjoy the hell out of the experience.
He’s an ass and didn’t want the trip. Your comment was an excuse for a ticket back home.
It wasn’t just the argument, he’s always been like this.
This is the perfect rom-com setup. Live it up!
OP -Make the best of a bad situation. Don’t let him ruin what’s left of your trip. It is what it was meant to be -he sounds like a child anyway, and I’m pretty sure you thought he was a man. You thought you were in a relationship with a man. Whoops.
Better off staying no contact. There’s a reason why he didn’t include you in his social media posts and why he got so angry when you asked him about it. He’s probably been looking for a way out of this relationship and grabbed the first opportunity he had. You’re better off without him. Enjoy bella Italia! Sono geloso!!
You’ve been given a gift! 3 months in Italy on your own!
This rom-com writes itself, you will drop a bag of oranges and a fella on a Vespa will stop and you’ll chase them all over the street together and there begins your madcap adventure.
Or even better, you have a delicious 3 months of solitude discovering what you love most.
What you won’t have is anyone disrespecting or yelling at you while you tiptoe around their temperament. Hooray!
Guess he’s not the one.
Find a hot Italian rebound!
It’s ok to vacation in an AirBnb and use DoorDash. It’s ok to just stare out the window or sit on the balcony and enjoy Italy from there.
Change your mindset if you can, this is a gift. He showed himself to be petulant and immature and left on day one instead of day 30. Enjoy your peace. Work, reflect, relax, enjoy the beautiful country you’re in, take yourself out for some delicious food and reflect on where you are and where you want to go- up to and including what led you to put up with a relationship with such a person. Enjoy these next few months as much as you can, cry, heal, sit with your feelings and emerge better than ever!
Hey girl, if you happen to be in Trieste on Sunday evening, you can join me (f) and my friend (m) for the best pizza in town. Our treat.
Normal people don’t get this mad over something this insignificant. Sounds like he has had something boiling for a while and isn’t man enough to talk about it like an adult. I would cut ties. He is showing you who he is. There are better men out there than this. Let this one go so you can embrace the one that will love and respect you. That will look forward to walking through the door everyday and just hugging. I look forward everyday to that even when I am irritated. I just want to hug my husband because all the daily annoyances fall aside and we can just take a moment to be together. OP this is not him.
lmao what?? thats wild
Who made the bookings? You need to worry about whether he is able to cancel all of the bookings or not.
Chiming in with a quick personal story – I dated an Italian guy a few years ago (I’m from US) and we agreed I would come live in Rome for 3 months after we had been dating for over a year. Second week there I had a gut feeling (never did this before) and checked his phone. He was cheating on me. A LOT.
I was devastated and we had just begun our 3 month dream getaway in Italy. It took me 10 days to figure out my plan but I ended up leaving and staying with friends in London, Zurich, and Barcelona for the next 3 months. It was one of the most amazing experiences I ever had and I wouldn’t have been able to do it if I hadn’t got my heart broken first.
Don’t give up on your dream, pivot and figure out what works best for you – be it with friends, family, or stick it out in your Airbnb. You will have a life changing experience.
And whatever you do, DO NOT go back to this loser. You had a gut feeling he was hiding you, and his reaction only confirmed his shadiness. His loss! Go do you girl.