Are you the asshole for bringing generic whipped topping instead of Cool Whip when asked by girlfriend’s mom? #familydrama #brandloyalty #BBQdilemma
Have you ever found yourself in a sticky situation when bringing a substitute product instead of the requested brand? #fooddilemma #socialetiquette #genericvsnamebrand
Is there really a significant difference between generic and name brand whipped topping? #qualitycomparison #personalpreferences #grocerystorewoes
YTA
You could have:
– Called an asked
– Planned ahead and gone to the store NOT on the way to the BBQ
There are differences between store brands and named brands. It might be the taste is slightly different, the store brand might have cheaper stuff in it which someone can’t and don’t want to eat. I never buy store brand cream cheese because the texture weirds me out which is a problem I never had with the name brands.
NTA
You all may not agree but the mom was extremely rude, imho. Instead of being grateful, she stabbed OP in the back by talking trash about it.
A gracious host is thankful, not condescending, making faces and talking crap. She’s the AH.
Your gf should have called her mom out about it, privately, of course.
EDIT: Her mom should have served what you bought and I’m sure it would have tasted just fine.
NTA My dad is one of those “generic bad name brand good” people. My mom and I simply save the name brand containers clean them and replace them with the generic versions. Trust me, he hasn’t noticed. Also anyone who is using Cool Whip vs making homemade whipped cream doesn’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to taste. The disrespect she showed a guest was gross and I’d be avoiding being over there if you don’t have to.
NTA. Yes, there is almost always a difference between the generic product and the brand name, so if I were you, I’d call and ask. Keep it in mind for the next time someone asks something like that of you. But her reaction is over the top. Too much malice and nagging for a relatively innocent mistake.
YTA-The idea when bringing stuff is to be helpful. You could have brought flowers if you just wanted to bring something. If someone asks for a specific thing I think you either need to bring it or ask if the alternative is okay. Honestly store brands can come off as being cheap too. It’s why most people get generic. I don’t think you were trying to be an AH and she was being dramatic but I understand why she was annoyed.
My passive aggressive ass would have said “cool whip? I make mine with homemade whip cream but this is good to I guess”
😂😂😂😂😂😂
This is a crystal ball into your future if you stay with this girlfriend and she continues to handle her mom like this. You did nothing wrong. This isn’t a diamond/CZ switcheroo, it’s one where frothed-up vegetable oil in a blue tub was replaced by the same frothed-up vegetable oil in a different color container. Or one of a slightly different shade of blue.
ESH.
When you’re responsible for bringing something, don’t put off buying it until the absolute last possible second. The likelihood of coming up short is a lot higher when there’s no time to try again (whether that’s the next day or a different store).
If getting the name brand was important to her, it would have been smart for her to actually say that. Her reaction to getting an alternative brand was over the top, especially when she didn’t tell you that getting the name brand is important. The various whipped topping brands do have some slight variance in taste and feel (or at least, they do to folks with sensitive palates like me), but it’s not that big a difference.
ESH. Cool Whip has a distinctive taste and off-brand isn’t identical. It also has added ingredients to stabilize it: it doesn’t deflate over time like fresh whipped cream. You were asked to bring Cool Whip. If you couldn’t bring Cool Whip, you should have called your gf. You couldn’t take 10 seconds to text her?
Mom sucks cause she was rude.
YTA.
Just because you can’t tell the difference doesn’t mean that there isn’t a difference.
NTA but a slacker
First, I’ll say that I think it was wrong for the mom to make snarky comments. However I could see why she was annoyed. You had a whole week and you waited until the last minute to get it and only went to one store. Like you said, she probably also thought it was an “easy enough” task to ask of you…but you did not deliver.
It may not seem like a big deal to those who don’t cook often or enjoy specific tastes; however some people (me included) like specific brands because the taste/content may be different. Cool Whip is a specific enough thing that it probably mattered. For example, if someone asks for Heinz ketchup, they may be disappointed that you brought an off-brand. Or if someone asks you to bring Mexican Coke for a dish they’re making and you bring regular coke, the dish may not taste the same because regular coke doesn’t have sugar cane sugar like Mexican coke. Maybe her dish specifically called for Cool Whip? It probably didn’t help your case that the dad was able to go out and easily find the Cool Whip, when you weren’t able to. 😅
Edit: I just want to mention that I use generic brands all the time for things like spices, milk, butter and such. However there are brands that tastes different.
ESH. The way she handled it was bad yes, but there are definitely some products where name brand vs generic makes a difference. (Can’t speak to cool whip because I’ve never had it, but there have been products where I bought generic once and never again). And really it’s on you for not calling to check, particularly since you assumed it would be easy and left it to the last minute. Thats on you.
YTA, there is definitely a taste difference and you should have called to ask or just gone to another store. It’s not up to you to change things up just because it’s an inconvenience for you, if you are tasked to get a thing and you agree to it then it should be that specific thing.
NTA – And tbh, I’m a little surprised there are so many YTA responses. Most of the time, the difference between most generic/brand name products is little to none. I can’t speak regarding Cool Whip, but I imagine the difference negligible. Certainly not worth your gf’s mother being so passive aggressive.
ESH
It does sound like Gf’s mom was rude, though I wonder if you didn’t read too much in to it.
Though you did fail. Some store brands are really good. Some are absolute sh1t. You offered to bring something. You left the chore to the very last possible minute. Instead if helping, you created extra work and messed with their time. It’s likely it would have been easier for them to get the cool whip with everything else.
It really depends on the difference in quality.
Info: Are there any allergys in your family? I am gluten intollerant. If you just change an ingredient I know for another, it could fuck me up. I would need to check the container.
Cool wip alternatives could contain gluten.
If the host is aware of problems like this she might have made sure to use the right thing.
Still she could have explained it to you instead of making a fuss if this was the case.
Don’t leave it until the last minute in future so that if there is a problem you can solve it.
If someone asks for a specific item then that’s what you need to take.
YTA ….. Remember the 7p’s – Prior Planning and Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance
Gf’s family are rude and openly so.
Your product was just fine and there was no need for them
to make such a big deal out of it, deliberately signaling their
displeasure. NTA and next time, don’t bring anything and if
they ask why, say “After all the fuss that was made over the
cool whip last time, no way”.
NTA you did nothing wrong. Brand snobs are snobs.
I’m just laughing about this:
> it’s made with “real Cool Whip”
That’s like saying it’s made with “real American cheese” or “real imitation crab meat.”
Anyway, you perhaps could have communicated better, but the passive aggressiveness of your girlfriend’s mom wasn’t called for either.
If you want to smooth things over, you could call her to apologize, explain that you didn’t understand the importance of it being a particular brand, and that in the future, she can count on you to bring exactly what’s specified. This would earn you some brownie points with her and doesn’t really cost you anything, because that’s probably what you’d do in the wake of this incident anyway.
I am a bit concerned, however, that your girlfriend didn’t call out her mother’s passive aggressive behavior. That’s something to watch out for.
NTA.
NTA. What your gf’s mother did wasn’t overdramatic, it was nasty and outrageously rude.
There could be numerous reasons that you didn’t get the name brand product, and all of them valid. A gracious hostess would have thanked you for bringing the item and asked her partner to quietly get the one she prefers, or use an alternative – basically never, ever bring it to your attention that she doesn’t like the product you chose. The fact your gf brushes this off makes me think red flags abound for her family.
Your gf’s mother is classless and nasty, and this will inevitably be something she brings up regularly – I recommend you take the high ground with something like, “It’s always annoying when stores run out of certain products, but I’m a problem solver at heart.”
NTA. Your gf’s mother should learn to let shit go.
I wanna say N T A but as someone who bakes I have to go ESH.
Sometimes generic works, sometimes it doesn’t. If you need something to have a particular consistency then you want what you know works instead of testing something you haven’t used before in a party setting.
NTA Imagine being on your high horse about COOL WHIP, it’s already the white trash version of whipped cream.