#WorkplaceSafety #HRSupport #MentalHealth
Hey everyone! 🌟 I find myself in a bit of a dilemma and could really use some advice. Here’s the situation:
Recently, I went through a really traumatic experience. I was sexually assaulted by a friend’s boyfriend while she was in the bathroom. 😢 I took the brave step to report it to the authorities. However, the aftermath has been pretty overwhelming—now he’s threatening to contact my workplace and share videos of me having a good time, including ones where I’m drinking and dancing. While I’m 25 and don’t have anything illegal happening in those videos (although I might be a little worried about them including possible smoking), I’m concerned about how this could affect my job.
Now, I’m left wondering whether I should reach out to HR proactively or just wait to see if he really follows through on his threat. 🤔
Here are a few things I’m considering:
- HR Communication: Telling HR could provide them with context and prepare them for any potential fallout. They might also offer you support and advice on how to navigate this situation.
- Workplace Drama: It’s tough to think about what could happen if they get contacted—will there be judgment? Will it affect my reputation?
- Mental Wellness: The stress of the potential drama could really take a toll on my mental health. Doing nothing might just keep me anxious and on edge.
Possible Solutions:
- Reach Out to HR: I might lean toward informing them ahead of time. It could help me feel more in control and less anxious about what might happen.
- Document Everything: Keeping records of any communications or threats might strengthen my case down the road, should I need to escalate it.
What do you all think? Have any of you faced a similar situation? How did you handle it? I’d love to hear any tips or suggestions you might have. Let’s support one another! 💬
IANHR
If you are positive you weren’t involved in any illegal activity, I would suggest you report the threats to the police. If you aren’t sure about legality, obtain your own lawyer to communicate for you.
If you do decide to report to HR, I would keep it vague.
“I was the victim of a crime and I have filed a police report. The accused has threatened to contact my work in an effort to intimidate me. I want you to be aware.”
is there an ongoing police investigation?
If so, tell HR. But not because you need to be worried about a video of you living a normal adult life. But because if this douche canoe contacts them, HR will know not to delete and ignore- that they may have something material to an ongoing criminal case, and it should be preserved. A lot of HR departments would lovvvvvvee a chance to help nail an embittered weasel like this to the ground. These sorts of emails happen all the time and are usually deleted, ignore, and you never hear about it. The chance to help someone regret their sad life choices? Yes, please.
Have a copy of the police report and the investigating officer’s contact information to give to HR.
You can also ask the police “hey, what do I do if this guy follows through on this threat?”
First, sorry for what happened to you. Effing vile.
Let it play. That’s a shitbag and they’re desperate. He is wanting to change your behavior. The threat is the thing that potentially does that, not actually carrying it out. Put more simply, there’s no reason for him to carry out his threat; he doesn’t get what he wants. Maybe he’s just that big of a creepy asshole, but my bet is that he’s scared more than anything. And he should be.
HR doesn’t care what you do in your free time as long as it:
1. Isn’t harming anyone
2. Isn’t illegal
3. Isn’t harming the company
Some may judge you silently, but unless we work for small-minded institutions, and are forced to care, we really don’t care what you do in your free time.
I would take his threats to the police and add it to the report. Is this witness intimidation or maybe conspiracy to obstruct justice? Who knows but the cops will and I do think it’s something that is illegal on top of what he already did. Please report this threat to the police even if you contact hr
SA While ur friend was in the bathroom? How long was she gone and I hope you screamed and made it known to ur friend when she got out of the bathroom?