#FamilyBusiness #UnpaidLabor #WorkEthics #EmployeeRights #FairPay #CareerGrowth
Feeling Undervalued and Overworked
Are you tired of feeling undervalued and overworked in your family’s business? Do you find yourself constantly being asked to do free labor for relatives who fail to recognize your worth? If so, you are not alone. Many individuals face similar dilemmas when it comes to balancing family expectations and fair compensation for their hard work.
One individual shared their experience of working for their dad and uncle’s bar/restaurant, handling management, cooking, cleaning, serving, event coordination, marketing, web development, and branding for the entire business. Despite their specialized skills and qualifications, they were only paid $15 an hour for management tasks and as low as $6 an hour for serving and bartending.
After three years of being underpaid and overworked, with no benefits or pay raise in sight, this individual decided to leave and pursue a more rewarding career opportunity. They landed a chief marketing officer position with a large company that not only compensated them well but also provided full benefits and a supportive work environment.
Setting Boundaries and Prioritizing Your Worth
It can be challenging to navigate the dynamics of working for family members who fail to recognize your value and compensate you fairly for your contributions. In such situations, it is essential to set boundaries and prioritize your worth. Here are some practical solutions to address this common problem:
1. Communicate Your Worth:
- Clearly communicate your skills, qualifications, and worth to your family members.
- Explain the market value of your services and why fair compensation is essential for your sustenance.
2. Establish Boundaries:
- Set clear boundaries regarding the type of work you are willing to do for free and the tasks that require fair compensation.
- Avoid being taken advantage of by clearly delineating your terms and conditions.
3. Seek External Opportunities:
- Explore external job opportunities that recognize and appreciate your skills and offer fair compensation.
- Do not hesitate to walk away from toxic work environments that fail to value your worth.
Empowering Yourself and Upholding Your Rights
Remember, you have the power to empower yourself and uphold your rights in any work setting, including family businesses. Do not be afraid to assert your value, set boundaries, and seek opportunities that honor your worth. By prioritizing your growth and well-being, you can build a successful career path that aligns with your skills and ambitions.
> However, they told me they aren’t able to pay me and my rich uncle managed to say to me “you shouldn’t expect stuff from your family like that.”
NTA. Your family doesn’t want to pay you what you’re worth using the sad “but family” excuse. It’s just manipulation so they can pocket more cash by not actually paying you.
They are the AHs and they’re pretty greedy as well.
NTA. Next time uncle asks for any free labor from you, tell him he “shouldn’t expect stuff from family like that.”
NTA. They got their “free labor” from you already. For years. Tell them the best you can do is provide a referral to someone who could do the work for them. Throw their words back at them: “You can’t expect family to just do stuff like that for free. Here’s a referral – good luck!”
NTA
When it comes to employment, even if it’s for family, you have to be the one to decide your value.
You’ve decided what you’re time and effort are worth, went out and found somewhere you can get it and they aren’t willing/able to pay it. sucks to suck for them but good for you.
NTA how in the world would you ever be the bad one in this situation you kinda need money to live
NTA how in the world would you ever be the bad one in this situation you kinda need money to live
NTA,
People are not entitled to your time/services because they’re family.
NTA. You were nice enough to work for very little while they were starting their business. You gave them 3 years to give you a decent pay raise and acknowledge your hard work, but they didn’t.
Maybe you can suggest an intern you know, or some newbie who will do some work for them for super cheap.
NTA. For your “family” to promise you health insurance and then just …… not? WTF. They had a good long while of your doing all of this work, they had time to see how much effort and time you had to put into getting this all done, and to know that they’d need someone else for when you left. They should never have expected you to be willing to continue to do all of this for free.
NTA
Tell your uncle and your dad: “you shouldn’t expect stuff from your family like that.”
I’d also like to add, my uncle told my dad I had an attitude problem when I refused to do something right then and there when he asked for it and set some boundaries. Like way to treat me like a peasant. God forbid I have boundaries.
> I feel like I’m one of those workers to him
NTA – You are…Rich Uncle is likely rich for a reason and yes you should expect something better from two extremely close relatives, they won’t give it but you should expect it.
NTA
Value yourself, even if they show they don’t value your time.
If they don’t want to fairly compensate you, they need to hire another professional.
If I were you, I would completely just not take any work from them. Say you are too busy, your company doesn’t allow side gigs if this helps reduce the drama. Not worth the headache, then no family drama.
NTA. They are trying to get free professional labor, and prior to that, they were succeeding in getting your labor at poverty wages. People who expect this type of thing from you are not reasonable, and you do not have to listen to their demands.
Is it reasonable to help family sometimes? Sure. In limited amounts, in some circumstances. But not in their work world. Ask them if they are willing to cater your new employer for free, just to help a family member. See what their response is, and let that guide your response to them.
All this is aside from your uncle’s attitude. If he treats you like this, regardless of how much money he has, you have no obligation to provide him with favors.
NTA. Remember the “friends and family” rate should be at least 3x your normal pay.
NTA – I’d respond to him with something like this.
“*Hi Uncle, I was happy to help you out when the business was starting. I have a lot of really fond memories of setting up the branding, marketing strategy, and web presence for the bar. I didn’t even mind chipping in with the cooking, cleaning, serving, and bartending because I knew you needed help. But with me working full time and the bar being as successful as it is, I don’t have the time to dedicate to you in order to meet your needs and expectations. I’m happy to help you find someone who charges reasonable rates, but I won’t be able to help you going forward.*”
Say you will do what they want… but, darn it, your schedule just doesn’t line up. But you will keep them in mind!
And somehow your schedule just never works out.
Your family got years of labor from you, you have done enough.
Good for you for getting out and getting a *real* job with actual benefits and good pay. Feel no guilt, and if necessary, you can limit your contact with your demanding family members.
Rich uncle and dad can nitpick somebody else for his website and video needs, it doesn’t have to be *you*. NTA
NTA
Your uncle is a disgusting pig. Don’t do the work.
NTA- no is a complete sentence
Send them an invoice for the going rate on the items they want you to do as well as links to firms that handle that work in your area. Then see which they want to pay oh and make sure you get half up front before you touch a keypad.
my step mom got her employers companies website redesigned and upgraded by my BIL who works at microsoft(judgements whatever) for free….my father died, she stopped talking to all of us after she sold our old house and still works at that place……..f’ family!!!!
NTA
Ferengi Rule of Acquisition #111 – Treat people in your debt like family: exploit them.
If someone’s exploiting you, you’re NTA for not going along with it.
NTA. He has the money. He can pay.
NTA – Just remind your rich uncle of his own words: “you shouldn’t expect stuff from your family like that.”
“Stuff like that” = slave labor from your nephew
I’m sorry I’m calling absolute BS that this is real. Graduated in 2020, worked a couple years for a small family business, now 4 years later your the CHEIF MARKETING OFFICER MAKING 150 AN HOUR. In 4 years with minimal experience
Soo very very very inexperienced that bro doesn’t know what a salary is and no way would be making any kind of hourly wage. No cheif of ANYTHING is paid an hourly salary… 🤔
First of NTA. Second, does the rest of the family know how they treated you and are still treating you? Because if I were you, I’d be a problem at the next family get together.
First of NTA. Second, does the rest of the family know how they treated you and are still treating you? Because if I were you, I’d be a problem at the next family get together.
Nta
NTA Charge them market price.
Nta.
Simply tell him.
I learned that family and business don’t mix. And since you think taking advantage of my skills because we share blood is ok but doing nothing to help me out, I will not be helping. I am not your servant. I am not your employee. I am not your atm by getting free stuff that I get paid well for at my job. That you feel entitled enough to use family and then manipulate them buy using we are family but offering nothing in exchange and not caring what it costs me then I will not only refuse but will say don’t ask again. I don’t feel like being shafted and struggling again while you roll in money and are too cheap to HELP family like you are demanding to be helped.
“NTA You shouldn’t expect stuff from your family like that” Exactly, he shouldn’t expect your labor for free. What’s the difference between time and money especially when the time is being used to make money?. He probably got rich by gaslighting and abusing people for cheap labor. He can hire someone else. You’re busy with your job and boundaries are ok.
Tell your uncle/dad that your hourly rate is 150 an hour.
NTA
Cash up front.
NTA if they are not willing to pay you a decent amount for all that work then let them do it themselves and see how they like being overworked, it’s not like they are doing to find someone else who is able and willing to do all that work for the pay they are offering
NTA, and please see to it that they read these comments. They expect you to work like an indentured servant because “FAMBLY”, but they don’t value or respect you like you are. They can hire the help they need ( maybe not if they think they can pay slave wages and keep help ). Are they from a different place, or are they stuck in a previous time period and don’t realize that wages aren’t $1.25 an hour anymore?
Say to your uncle,”I’m betting you didn’t get rich by doing things for free.”
Tell your uncle to hire a different slave to bow down to him cause your done. Then hang up. Don’t even ask about getting paid even if he says he will he won’t so there is no point. He can hire another worker to do it not you your no for free
NTA
If you’re on the payroll then you aren’t family, you’re an employee.
Friend, there are things in this world other than cash. Your uncle may be rich but the business sounds cash poor.
Next time they ask for your help for free. Say “sure, for a small piece of the asset. Stock or a small ownership share.” After all if you’re going to help make this thing great, and not get paid well now, you should be eligible for a taste of that success later on. You’ll even offer the family discount on your normal rate of pay.
The problem is they’re still treating you like a kid they can make do customer service for minimum wage (hope you got tips). Not the man who can do what you do.
They have to adjust. Not you
Fake