What is it like experiencing nepotism in the workplace? Have you ever felt undervalued or mistreated due to family connections? Learn from a personal account of struggling with nepotism, manipulation, and unfair treatment in a family-owned accounting firm. Follow along as the narrator navigates difficult relationships, financial struggles, and the pursuit of independence in a toxic work environment. #nepotism #workplaceissues #familybusiness #careerstruggles #workplacerelationships
That’s not nepotism or how it works.
Don’t bother. You’re not getting the firm and he’s just playing with your emotions at this point. Fuck him and his shitty firm. If you really want to fuck with him, start your own firm and start poaching his customers.
That’s not nepotism. That’s abuse from a narcissist.
Steal his client list and put him out of business.
I’m gonna give you the opposite advice most people get about their parents: Tell him he’s a piece of shit before he dies. You’ll regret it if you don’t.
I would cut him out of my life.
Oh dear. If you can, please start working towards your own freedom. Maybe talk to a lawyer? There’s a Lot of sketchy things in your post that I don’t have the ability to comment on. Just make sure that who ever you try to work for is far away from your father’s influence.
This is why I refused to join the family business. It’s heartbreaking.
This is why I never worked for my grandfather. I saw how he treated my cousins and wanted no part of it. He didn’t bother to make a will and none of the folks that worked for him for decades got a dime for their loyalty.
Your are totally being strung along OP.
Get it in writing
You’re father sounds like mine. We’ve been estranged since the mid ‘90’s. He abused and treated me like crap most of my life. I feel for you. He favoured my younger brother most of my life and “groomed” him to take over the family business. While ignoring me and putting me down. He convinced me I was nothing. I had enough and cut him off in my mid 20’s. Guess what? My brother had no interest in the family business. He sought higher education and did his own thing. His “dream” of his beloved son taking over never happened. He’s 85 now and it shut down when he couldn’t run it anymore (the 2 of us are his only children). He’s made it clear to family members that he’s left everything to my brother. I don’t deserve anything because I’m a terrible daughter ie I wouldn’t put up with his BS. I’m not well off financially and could use the money but I’m not surprised. Don’t get your hopes up. His money is just another way to manipulate you.
Oh, hon. You have an abusive father, it’s no wonder you had an abusive marriage. You found the strength to walk away from your spouse, you need to do the same with your father.
He either signs a contract giving you the business (he won’t) or you walk away and never look back.
Not nepotism. This is abuse and control.
If you can take over his, why not just start your own?
Honestly you should just start treating him like shit. The time to be the bigger person has passed.
That isn’t nepotism.
Stop playing his stupid games. He’s leaving you nothing. Except a bad taste in your mouth.
You are not a nepo hire, you’re someone who your dad knew he could exploit.
When people talk about nepotism, they’re talking about the silver spoon babies who go to ivy leave schools, paid for by their family, and then immediately tossed into a six figure job where their only actual responsibility is making sure their golf game is up to snuff and talking about how they got there by their bootstraps. The other ones who are hired by a friend or family to be managers, who suck at it, and who never get fired in spite of it, leaving the rest of the staff to cover for them or take the punishments.
You, you were just exploited.
Are there literally no other jobs in this town? Its been 20 years. Stop holding out for someone else, least of all this ass you work for, to change your life. This guy will ALWAYS hold you back, down, and out. Thats the only thing you can count on. Sorry. Get out and move on. You can do this.
I don’t think this is nepotism so much as it’s a terribly shitty boss that you just couldn’t extricate yourself from.
That’s how my dad is; your dad is going to give it to Marie. Escape and don’t talk to your dad again. Build your down firm and clients to protect your reputation from his tantrums.
This isn’t nepotism, this behavior is the reason. Your dad got a divorce, he’s a massive dickhead
Tell him to put it in writing if he wants your faith and trust.
GEEZUS. I lost my tourism job in 2020, you know why, and had some family members who do mortgage broker business who were getting inundated and overwhelmed with work during the low rate crazy sellers market time, so I learned how to be their assistant and did that till the rates went up and contracts for buys and refinances trickled down to near nothing.
They gave me a severance, and a few months warning before letting me go, and the experience I had with them let me transition into the job I have now.
THAT is nepotism.
You just got abused! I hope you can break away safely.
you mentioned two of the slimiest professions in existence. accountant fraud machine validator and police thug brutalizer enforcer. get away from anything having to do with either of those toxic soul destroying professions (if they can even be called that) immediately.
I think you need to read that all back to yourself and then ask yourself if you’re happy to keep allowing this treatment. I’m really sorry this has happened to you, and I know it’s not easy to change situations, but there comes a point where you have to take ownership and make a change.
If your coworkers and clients love you, and you have the certs, why not start your own firm and take the clients and coworkers with you? I know that’s not cheap or easy to do, but neither is buying an existing firm. I assume if you have the money to buy him out you might have the means to start your own thing.
Tell your dad that the only way you will come back is if he signs a contract that you had someone create that states that when he retires. You are getting that 60% of the firm and if he tries to fire you or anything else to stop you from getting that 60%. He is required to retire right then and there and give you the 60% of the company right then and there. And if he tries to sabatoge the company from inside. You will sue him for how much the company is worth when the contract was made.
Get it in writing or get out. If you don’t have a contract, he will never make you a partner. I’ve read this story too many times.
Nepotism or not, it’s (almost) never a good idea to work for family. There are too many emotions and too little professionalism there to genuinely build up a working relationship.
I know there are some who can make it work as a family, but I read/hear more stories like this one than I read/hear success stories.
I am so sorry youve dealt with this. For so long. I hope youre finally able to get some type of peace with this new job and maybe see a therapist bc your dad seems abusive AF to me.
This is setting off all my “written by AI” alarm bells. Is it really just me?
In writing from a lawyer or no play. Do not waste any more of your life.
Ok, most of y’all seem hung up on my use of the word nepotism and how “that’s not how it works.”
That was the point I was trying to make, apparently unsuccessfully. I face all the negatives while everyone looking from the outside sees nepotism.
I got this job bc of my dad. I just didn’t think he’d work me 2 decades and leave me nothing to show for it.
This makes me so glad that I don’t really want anything my father has to offer.
He tried very very hard to get me into the same fields he worked in, so I could continue to be financially useful to him after I moved out of the household. Even tried starving me when it got obvious I’d grow too big for one of them, and then put me to work doing heavy labor like I was a full grown man despite being a little girl who’d been playing with dolls and mud earlier that summer.
He’s still trying. He’ll dangle his retirement savings and claim he’ll give me some of it if I just do what he wants. But it’s just a carrot on a stick and he’s got no intention of ever letting me have more than the tiniest sliver of it.
Some people don’t love their kids. But sex is fun, babies happen, and unloved babies get used as labor until they escape their parents.
I grew up with a dude who is unlikely to ever escape. Last I heard he is paying rent to stay in his childhood bedroom and perform nearly all the household tasks from grocery shopping to yard work. He’s essentially his mother’s unloved live-in servant and emotional support dog. And god forbid he not spend his entire paycheck on every holiday meal for the rest of the family, which he must prepare for them of course, and do all the clean up afterwards. Last time he served steak his early 30s “baby” brother complained about not getting lobster and their mother agreed it was so selfish and mean to not serve them lobster.
Goddamn talk about the perfect reason to go no contact. What a fucking asshole, I could never imagine abusing my child this way, who the fuck purposely ruins their own child’s work life?
OP you can’t win here, there is no winning and daddy dearest is probably lying. There very well could be an agreement where on a partners death the shares go to the survivors. I would start my own firm right next door to his.
Can you record what he says and then blast him all over social media to ruin his career? He doesn’t deserve peace fir what he out you through.
Play nothing! Get it signed over to you and then show back up. Not a moment before.
Sweetheart, my very close family friend was just shafted in her mother’s will. The bulk was left to my brother, who is not related. She committed the cardinal sin of not being a perfect dutiful daughter… the same sin you are guilty of.
He will never, ever give you anything. Leave now, make a new life and start understanding that his problem is him. Not you.