#RelationshipAdvice #MovingOn #NJ #Breakup
Hey friends! So, my fiancé ghosted me last week and left me a breakup text…ouch. He still has a bunch of stuff at my place, including his dog 🐶 and two vehicles that don’t even run. I’m in NJ and need to figure out what to do with everything. Any suggestions on how to handle this situation? Here are some ideas:
– Reach out to a storage facility for short-term storage options 📦
– Contact a local animal shelter or rescue to rehome the dog 🏡
– Consider selling or donating his belongings 🛋️
It’s a tough spot to be in, but I know we can navigate through this together. Any advice or similar experiences to share? Let’s help each other out! 💔
Having landlord status in NJ. I wish I had that
Are you sure he’s alive? You should file a missing person report. And maybe turn his phone back on so you can contact him.
You really have a Legal Duty here. — You may not like it, and understandably so, but you do.
You are now effectively a Landlord doing an Eviction, and there are Rules for that. — (It is probably more-properly described as a Landlord who has had a Tenant abandon their Leasehold, and the Landlord then has to deal with the Personal Property left behind. — But that is really a Distinction without a Difference.)
First, you should send him a Demand Letter, telling him that he has a set amount of time from the date he Receives the Demand Letter to remove his Personal Property from your Real Property. — I would say that the minimum should be at least 3 days, but 7, 10 or 14 would be better. — Send the Demand Letter twice, simultaneously: — once via Certified Mail, Return Receipt Requested and once via USPS First Class Mail.
(Retain all of the Receipts, including the USPS Payment Receipt.)
What Landlords have to do is move all of their former Tenant’s belongings to a Storage Unit, and Pay for the first month’s Rent. — That covers the clothes and other small Personal Property.
The Vehicles should be Towed. — If you know someone of his, like his Parents or a Sibling, you could Tow it over to their House and leave them there (if you are feeling generous). — Alternatively, you could have a Towing Company Tow them and Store them and he can get them back via Payment of the what? — $50 a day they now commonly Charge.
As to the Dog, you must take the animal to the Pound or the SPCA or equivalent. — Every Municipality (or County) in New Jersey has an arrangement with a local Pound or SPCA.
Honestly, you are handling this very, very well. — You should be Proud of yourself for being a grown-up in this.
This may sound a little off to say, but: — Congratulations on how you are handling this, Adult Person!
She killed him
Its sad the way you speak about the dog
Also there must be some
Missing context why did he just ip and leave were
You guys fighting ? In a rough patch ? Substance abuse why doesn’t his family talk to him none of this sounds healthy
A guy in our area abruptly left his girlfriend. When she went to dispose of his stuff she found bloody sneakers. Turns out he robbed a woman and her disabled daughter and then killed them. That is how law enforcement caught up to him
I assume you have an email address for him. Use that.
30 days then presumed abandoned property. Then dispose of it how you will. Title property requires a special process. What county are you in?
The ring? Sheesh! I would keep that jerks dog and never let him have her back !!
Who owns the house? If you’re renting, is he on the lease?
If you can’t or won’t keep the dog, PLEASE reach out to a rescue in your area and consider fostering him until the dog can be rehomed. Let the rescue know the dog has been abandoned by your ex and follow their advice re: establishing yourself as sole owner (i.e., let the vet know the dog has been abandoned and have them document you as sole owner; if they’re chipped have the info on the chip changed to list you as the owner, etc.)
Please do not just drop the dog off at the shelter.
Good luck and take care! 🙏🏽💪🏽❤️
I hope it’s not and he just left but that’s a very common suicide tell.
Shut off his phone? There’s so many things a cell phone is needed for, and more specifically the phone number needs to be able to receive text and calls for authorization reasons.
Not only that, but how is he supposed to reasonably arrange to get at of those things you claim he has abandoned? You’re going to trek yourself through a lot of mud for this
But jokes aside, if he doesn’t retrieve his items,they are yours. Also, please don’t kick the dog. You are in a position where you can take care of him. He doesn’t deserve getting kicked. And rescues centres are dangerous
Keep the ring lol
NJ lays it all out here:
https://www.nj.gov/dca/divisions/codes/publications/pdf_lti/dis_remning_pers_proprty.pdf
This is presuming that it’s your house. Even if it’s not, you can still follow this.
How are you suppose to hear back from him if you shut his phone off
I would think to contact his family, parents first, to let them know that 1)he left and 2)that his items need to be collected. Remind them ever so often, so that you have established communication and so that you can say you made a good-faith attempt.
Also, they may be able to provide a forwarding address for him, or act as a go-between.
Poor Dog☹️
Feels good to shut off the phone but now you’re inevitably dragging this out because he has no way of getting in contact with you.. yeah it hurts but now your trying to hang on to something he bailed on you don’t move backwards
You shouldn’t have turned off his means of communication if you wanted him out in a speedy fashion. You could have lured him in w a stern warning that you’ll get rid of his stuff if he no shows again: