#RelationshipAdvice #FianceProblems #ExTalk #CommunicationIssues
Hey there, friend! 👋 Today, we’re going to dive into a tricky situation that one of our fellow Redditors is facing in their relationship. As we all know, navigating the waters of love and communication can be treacherous at times, but with a little guidance and understanding, we can work through even the most challenging of issues.
So, our friend (27M) found himself in a bit of a pickle when his fiancé (30M) made a rather inappropriate comment about her ex during a group conversation. Let’s dissect this situation and offer some advice on how to handle it with grace and understanding.
Understanding the Hurt
First and foremost, it’s crucial to acknowledge the hurt and embarrassment our friend is feeling after his fiancé made a comment about her ex’s genital size. This is a sensitive topic for many individuals, and it’s completely understandable that our friend would feel a mix of emotions in response to his fiancé’s words.
Open and Honest Communication
In any relationship, communication is key. It’s essential for our friend to express his feelings to his fiancé in a calm and respectful manner. By sharing his hurt and concerns, they can work towards finding a resolution that benefits both parties.
Revisiting Trust and Prioritization
Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship, and our friend’s fiancé may need to reevaluate the impact of her words on their bond. By prioritizing their commitment to one another and addressing past issues, they can work towards building a stronger and more transparent connection.
Advice from Ancient Teachings
In times of conflict and confusion, guidance from timeless teachings can offer valuable insights. The Bhagavad Gita, an ancient Indian scripture, emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and spiritual growth. By contemplating the teachings of the Bhagavad Gita, our friend can gain a deeper understanding of his own emotions and the dynamics of his relationship.
Moving Forward with Compassion
As our friend navigates this challenging situation, it’s crucial for both him and his fiancé to approach the issue with compassion and understanding. By fostering an environment of empathy and open dialogue, they can work towards healing any rifts in their relationship and reaffirm their commitment to one another.
In conclusion, the complexities of relationships often present us with unexpected challenges. However, with patience, understanding, and open communication, we can address even the most difficult of situations with grace and empathy. Our friend’s journey towards healing and resolution serves as a reminder that navigating the highs and lows of love requires a steady hand and an open heart. Cheers to learning and growing together! 🌟
Call off that wedding , that woman is a HUGE red flag.
That was a long winded description you gave to say she cheated on you. When you give shitty people a pass, do not be surprised they go on about their business being shitty. If you keep on rewarding bad behaviour what she does next its also on you.
Its mad you can accept her fucking this guy when she is with you but its the disrespectful dick discussion that got you in a tizzy.
Why on earth haven’t you broken up with this cheater?
This girl is a dumpster fire. How many times are you good with her cheating on you and lying?
I think that you haven’t really dealt with her previous betrayal. And you mention in a comment that you found her dressed and ready to meet her ex for a dinner you didn’t know about? And that she often mentions him while drunk?
You need to immediately pause all wedding plans. Do not further entangle your finances or legal ties. You are sharing your fiancée and relationship with her ex. He may be a ghost but it’s having a real impact on your relationship.
This needs communication. Hard talking until you can see a clearer path ahead.
This isn’t about manhood size or drunken mistakes. She has betrayed you with him, kept an ongoing relationship that you never knew about and still reminisces and refers to him years later. You should ready yourself that you need to walk away. Good luck.
she cheats and lies. why is she your fiancee?
I can only hope that my children grow up to marry people who cheated on them early in the relationship and lie about it. What a great romance origin story.
She’s TAH for sure. If it was a drunk mistake, it still deserved an apology. She’s also stupid to generalize ANY nationality in that way. Sounds like she just wanted to sound cool and knowledgeable but is neither.
I don’t like that she disregarded your very valid feelings. It was disrespectful to make any comment toward an ex. But especially one that is already a sore spot.
Get some self respect and get out of that relationship. She cheated on you.
Bro, I’ve seen your comments. I think you may need to revisit this whole marriage thing. She is still hung up on her ex, she cheated on you, has been disregarding your feelings around the betrayal, and it is cheaper to break up now than to divorce. I know it’s hard since y’all been together for a long time but man, save yourself a lifetime of pain with this woman.
“She hasn’t apologized or said she regrets it”
She doesn’t regret it, case closed.
It is sort of classless, not only talking about it in public, but with you in the room. It is also thoughtless. I would tell her you want an apology it was classless. Do you really want to marry her?
Can you explain how you got past her cheating, because that part isn’t clear? Is that what you are thinking about more since this incident?
Don’t marry this woman and definitely don’t have kids with her, it will ruin your life.
She brings him up because she still thinks about him. Especially when she’s drinking and in the mood. She’s thinking about having sex with him when she drinking. If that’s something you’re OK with, never living up to that, then get married.
I can’t figure out why you would entertain moving forward with a life with this person. If you snoop through her phone, I’m pretty sure you won’t like what you will find. Snooping isn’t in general a healthy thing to do, but holy shit does your give off 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
She cheated on you. Don’t stick around. She is still thinking about another dudes penis.
Dude… she cheated on you and is still being blatantly disrespectful to you about it in front of other people. I wouldn’t marry that type of person.
LDE bro
You forgave her for breaking your trust and you think she is going to respect your feelings?
It shouldn’t bother you but if it does drop the relationship and find better bro .
You forgave her and she’s proven she wasn’t prepared to be forgiven. If the cheating and this incident, and behavior afterward, aren’t enough to predict your future, for you, then just sweep it under the rug and move on.
If you decide to marry ur red-flag of a fiancé, you deserve what’s coming to you
Respectful people don’t talk about this shit in public. You’ll have trouble trusting her enough to be vulnerable if you’re worried she might share details about anything and everything. The relationship will not work without that trust.
once a cheater… and she will cheat again….
You wasted a lot of time, dump her and move on…
Seems like you settled. She’s not the one, especially since she’s betrayed you in the beginning of the relationship too
Bail out now! How many red flags do you need? She cheated on you. She insults you by bringing up at random times and she drinks too much! What more could you possibly need to leave?
DO NOT MARRY HER
So, she cheated on you in the past. That sucks. Sorry man. Idk how you moved past that so early on in a relationship.
This particular comment? To me, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Is it crass? Absolutely. She shouldn’t have said it. That conversation should have gone like, “hey babe, it didn’t make me feel great when you brought up your ex’s penis size in front of everyone.” “You’re right, I was drunk and I’m very sorry for doing that.” Her pouting and ignoring you? Ew. She’s super immature.
“After we had a conversation about being exclusive and both agreeing to be exclusive, she was still having sex with this person and was lying to me about it.”
Do NOT marry this woman.
You’ve been warned.
>I thought she had said before that she had sex on a work trip to Portugal she recently went on during a casual hook up. I brought that up,
Yikes. Don’t volunteer information about people’s private business in front of others.
The only thing that would bother me about your fiancé is that he’s a cheat.
Dump the cheater, and work on whatever it is that’s stopping you from standing up for yourself. You’re not looking at a good marriage with this woman
You’re a backup plan. Get out of that relationship.
Listen, she cheated on you long term, has zero tact or filter when speaking (don’t care if she is drunk), is not apologetic for hurting your feelings and having zero tact, and she’s racist/bigoted (all Portuguese are crazy?). Why have you chosen to continue to be with this person. You aren’t married and have no kids. Get out while you can.
So she cheated on you early on in the relationship and still talks to female friends about how much she loves other guys cocks?
Bro why’re you engaged to her?
She cheated on you. I don’t understand why you want to marry someone like that. I would tell her to go back to her ex if she is impressed with his dick so much. Next time you’re out with that group, and topics like that come up, gush over something about one of your exes. See how she responds. I’m a petty asshole though.
UpdateMe
After we had a conversation about being exclusive and both agreeing to be exclusive, she was still having sex with this person and was lying to me about it.
And you rolled with it, applause
You deserve so much better than this. She was sleeping with her ex for a year into your relationship. A year! This isn’t someone you build a life with. This is someone you dump when you find out they’ve been cheating. This isn’t love at all. You don’t cheat on the person you love.
I don’t get it – she cheated on you. Why are you with her still?
She is pissed at you and ignoring you. Remind her who cheated and then let her know you aren’t putting up with it any more and you’re walking away. She will change her tune real fast.
You mean your ex-fiance? Why did she become your fiance to begin with after cheating on you?
Oh no.. Bro. Red Flags all over the place. What Do you want us to say? Deep down you already know..
Drunk comment or not.. From the context she wasn’t Black-out Drunk was she? You simply dont talk about your Ex’es dick, or any sexual advantages Former Partners may or may not had.
It is incredible inconsidered and you should rethink the Engagement, at least give it more time.
I’m confused about the title and pronouns. Sorry if I messed up.
>she has never made a comment to me about my penis size.
And what about? I never do this kind of comments too. I agree that the other comment (my God,does she know all Portuguese cocks or is it just a dad joke about the Portugal national symbol?) about her ex is rude and disgusting.
>After we had a conversation about being exclusive and both agreeing to be exclusive, she was still having sex with this person and was lying to me about it.
Why did you do this to yourself? Why did you take a cheater back? Look, by doing this she lost any respect towards you, as her comment in front of you proves, no matter if she would eventually apologize. By refusing to apologize and acknowledge she did wrong, she’s showing her tru colors and what she thinks about you. In vino veritas, remember.
So it’s up to you, honey.
Sounds like she likes the big hogs, but they’re too much trouble. That’s where you come in.
As a woman married to a fellow who is majority Portuguese in ethnicity, I find your fiancée’s comments ill informed. It is bad form to label an entire ethnic group (or a gender group within it) as “crazy.” Like all ethnic groups, there is a range of personalities and behaviors from person to person.
Why the freaking hell are you marrying someone who deceived you and cheated?
She clearly REALLY liked that dicking down she got from him.
DO NOT MARRY THIS WOMAN!
>When my fiancé and I first started dating, I found out she was lying to me about casually hooking up with this person
DO NOT MARRY THIS WOMAN!
>After we had a conversation about being exclusive and both agreeing to be exclusive, she was still having sex with this person and was lying to me about it.
I repeat: DO NOT MARRY THIS WOMAN!
Forget the comment, she cheated on you, mate.
Your fiancée cheated on you and now you’re suprised that she’s betrayed you again?
Honestly. Dude.