#WorkRights #WeddingDay #LeaveApproved
Hey everyone, I’m new here and seeking some advice for a friend who is in a tough spot. Here’s the deal:
– My buddy had his leave approved for his wedding day and honeymoon months in advance 🎉
– He was told last minute he has to work and can face potential job loss if he doesn’t comply 😔
– Is this legal in North Carolina? Anyone have tips or contacts to help him out?
Possible Solutions:
– Encourage him to document everything – emails, approvals, conversations 📝
– Contact the HR department or seek legal advice to understand his rights 👩⚖️
– Look into labor laws and employee rights in North Carolina for more information 💼
Any advice or insights would be greatly appreciated! Let’s help out our friend in need. Thank you! 🙏
Yes it’s legal. Your buddy will want to start looking for another job.
Fuck the job off, marry the woman, enjoy the honeymoon.
There are 3 characters in your story. One is injured. One is getting married. And one seems totally available to step in. Problem solved. Boss man can work.
Tell your buddy that his job will **not** remember this sacrifice. It will not save him when he’s on the chopping block. His partner though? She’ll remember if he tries to work during the honey moon, and she’ll sure as shit remember if he works during the wedding day.
Folks from all over the country have come out to see this wedding. Explain the situation to at least some of them and try to scrounge up some scratch for him to survive until he finds a new job. Have him start a GoFundMe for it. Just **don’t let him miss his wedding for a job that does not value him enough to honour time off for a wedding**. They could fire his ass a month from now and then he’d have nothing.
Unfortunately there isn’t really a solution here. What the boss is doing to completely legal. By attending the wedding and honeymoon, it’s very likely he will lose his job if his boss makes good on the threat. However it could just be that, an empty threat.
Any boss that would do this is not someone you would want to work for anyway, so if he does keep his job, I’d recommend looking for another one after the honeymoon.
I’m sorry he’s in this situation.
Does his boss have a boss? I’d take it up with them if so. The firing is most likely an empty threat, but still is a dastardly move.
He absolutely can be fired, however as long as he has documentation that the time off was approved then they won’t be able to fire him for cause so he will be able to get unemployment.
Do bosses become assholes or do assholes become bosses?
Many years ago I had scheduled my wedding and honeymoon, then my employer decided to perform a CMS upgrade as well as some server updates (to a good old Glenayre paging terminal) during the time I had scheduled off.
I told them to shove it up their ass, and I ran it up to the level of ownership by walking in their offices and telling them that I would not be there.
I’m still happily married, that company is gone and so are all the people that went with it.
So what I’m saying here is, OP needs to give their balls a tug, and help their buddy to get their priorities squared away. Tell them no, the wedding and honeymoon are not negotiable, and take it as far up the management ladder as possible.
Why is he even acknowledging the message?
Ignore that shit….”Sorry I wasn’t available and didn’t see it”
Now there’s an argument.
For starters, no employer should have your direct contact number. Get a Google voice number that reroutes thru the app on your phone and use that. All work numbers should be stored into a group and Google that switch to DND when off the clock. Secondly program that app to only accept calls m-f 8-5.
Now he runs the risk of losing his job. Tell him to schedule a televisit Dr appt last min and describe bronchitis symptoms related to allergies inflammation and get a work excuse for HR that takes him out for the week. Fuck them, if they want to play games then fire right back at them.
Honestly I would simply respond at this point with…..
My availability doesn’t not support me working that schedule, I’ve explained this and you will have to figure it out without me.
Then block em all and ignore it.
Or…. respond simply with “heard” then don’t go in. When you get back they’ll argue and you say “and I saw your message and said as much. I never said I could come in or agreed to it. “
I’d have him go ahead and “test positive for Covid” or something similar.
at that point i would be doing something illegal. the nerve of these people to think they can just make you waste thousands of dollars so they can operate without issues for a few days
I wish I had a helpful response, but I’m honestly beyond disgusted with this to even think straight. So sorry for your buddy and his fiancée.
My wedding date had to be set between two big work events. I planned a year out and I was also asked to move it. I did not. That’s super toxic. After 10+ years, they laid me off after the company had financial issues for years, despite my endless dedication and high performance.
I’ll always remember they owned me every wedding anniversary.
If they are having coverage issues, probably won’t get fired right away but it’s new job time for sure.
Your friend’s manager is absolutely correct, your friend has the opportunity to set an example for the other workers. For this reason your friend should politely decline to reschedule his wedding and honeymoon.
Depending on how the company operates I would go above the manager to their boss + HR in an email and explain the situation emphasising how you don’t believe this decision reflects the values of the company. Doesn’t matter if that’s BS or not. What you want is the response in writing. Either you get the time off officially or they refuse, you take it off anyway and if you get fired now you have a nice document to share with the public/press to assist with publicising a go fund me. Whatever the outcome it’s time to look for a new job – any manager that thinks this is an acceptable request is just going to get worse and worse. Your buddy won’t have a good future in this company.
Ha! Yeah no im not giving up my wedding to work. Tell your friend to catch his boss’s bluff. Tell him to tell his boss that his 6 month advance notice is not a request and that he’ll be gone. Then have him look for new jobs after the honeymoon
America is fucking crazy
so your buddy is being punished because some guy didn’t stretch before a pick up basketball game?
Let them fire him and take his approved leave request and wedding proof to the unemployment office.
But I bet he won’t get fired, because then who else will work his job until they replace him? Boss is just trying to strong-arm him.
I’d honestly reach out to who ever is above this manager that is making the request. That is unreasonable and he should be covering that shift himself. No job is more important than major life events like your own wedding. I’d honestly start applying for new jobs if this is how they treat him. If they fire him for going to his own wedding I’d apply for unemployment immediately. I don’t quit though, just proceed with plans and don’t answer calls that day. When he gets back to work see what they do. If his boss tries to fire him they need to give a reason and I’d love someone to explain to management that an employee in good standing, took scheduled time off to attend their wedding so they’re fired and now they have to pay to retrain someone else.
Contact HR
Nope. He CANT negotiate. If he gives up his wedding they will have ZERO issue having him work during the birth of his child or during his parents funeral.
This is one of those moments in life where a person just has to take a hit. It’ll suck, but it’ll be less painful in the long run.
Edit to say don’t tell him to quit. They can fire him or let him go on his honeymoon.
He needs to set an example by not allowing his manager to screw him on his wedding night.
I would say that this isn’t a request, you’re simply informing them you won’t be there. Let them figure it out.
The boss can cryptically threaten to fire him, but will he actually fire him?
It will be stressful, but he should email his boss, CC HR and boss’s boss if possible and say he recognises that he was asked to work but he must decline that offer and he will be taking his pre-approved leave for wedding and honeymoon and he will be back at work as originally scheduled.
His boss can either be without him for a week or forever. And if he doesn’t have coverage for a week, he likely doesn’t have coverage forever.
Either way, he should start sending out his resume.
Yeah that would be a No. it’s my wedding day. Jobs come and go and wtf is the “committed to my company” nah dude I’m setting example for my employees everyday showing them your life and family comes first and this is a perfect example. I’d let them fire me which won’t happen. If the other dude is out injured and you need me to cancel my wedding date chances are you ain’t firing me at least not right away. If start looking for a job anyway
Welp, sounds like your friend needs to update the resume and find a better place of employment and start fresh. Imagine if he starts a family and on delivery day “welp sorry, tending to this company is more important than the birth of your child”.
If he caves his soon to be wife is never going to forget this. Ever.
He should get fired for this, not resign. Then he should tell everybody who and why he was fired. After his lovely honeymoon.
Choose wisely, his wife will absolutely remember long after his boss has forgotten even his name.
Literally the worst thing the boss can do is fire him. Or he can ruin his entire life by going into work. I guarantee I would not only cancel the wedding, but end the relationship, if my fiance went into work on our wedding day
Family first. The end.
They’re testing him. If he doesn’t stand his ground, they will forever treat him like a mule.
He should continue with his scheduled plans. If there’s pushback, he should move on anyway.
If someone set the example to work on their wedding day I would be quitting immediately.
No one wants to work at a company like that. I would be forwarding that chat to HR because this guy should not be in charge. Thats the kind of bad PR that would kill a company.
“I will not be available to work. I will be on my approved leave to celebrate an important life event that I’ve already invested a significant amount of money in. I will be available to resume work at the end of this scheduled leave.”
It may take an appeal, but he can probably get unemployment pay if he’s fired.
Your friend should go on with his wedding and honeymoon. The boss is trying to intimidate him in to “voluntarily” working through his wedding.
I agree if he gets fired he should start a GoFundMe.
And also go to the local news.
Sometimes shame is the best solution.
And I also strongly agree that his work will never remember his sacrifice but his wife will.
Friend needs to conveniently “get sick” and be out for two weeks.
Oh no I’m so sorry to hear about his positive Covid test
He needs to set an example by taking his approved leave
If he gets fired for attending his own wedding and honeymoon, he can file for unemployment. Additionally, he needs to name names…company and manager on all social media sites, LinkedIn, etc. Put them out of business if possible.
Dude wants the marriage to fail so he can continue to exploit his employee. Time for groom to show where his priorities are.
Call their bluff. Let them try and fire him.
Tell him to take the time off anyway. He should tell the boss if the other manager was serious about his work then he would come in, injured or not.
Have him go to HIS wedding & honeymoon. If his boss fires him after approving the time off.
Have him apply for unemployment and start a go fund me fundraiser.
Make sure that EVERYONE knows what company this is so the public can sink it.
Also live in NC, yes this is completely legal. Your friend’s boss can unapprove his time off whenever he wants and can terminate your friend for refusing to come in. However any company worth their salt wouldn’t treat your friend like this on his wedding day (unfortunately there’s a lot that aren’t worth their salt). Best answer here? Tell your friend to go to his wedding and to attend his honey moon as planned. He needs to submit in writing that he is not coming in as the request was approved 6 months prior and plans cannot be changed, rope HR in on the email with this same explanation. He will need to be prepared to file for unemployment in the likelihood he’s terminated for it.
Also what part of NC? if he gets terminated I know of several good companies hiring in my area 🙂