#MentalIllness #Stalking #SafetyConcerns #NeighborhoodIssues #ArizonaLiving
🚨 Dealing with a mentally ill child who is stalking you is a serious and concerning situation. It’s important to take the necessary steps to protect yourself and your family while approaching the delicate matter with empathy and understanding. Here’s what you can do:
## Understanding the Situation
It’s crucial to understand the background and context of the situation before taking any steps to address it. In this particular case, the child in question, Andrew, has been diagnosed with a delusional disorder and is on the autism spectrum. It’s clear that his behavior is a result of his mental health condition, and approaching the situation with sensitivity is key.
## Assessing the Risks
Before taking any action, it’s important to assess the risks associated with the stalking behavior. Evaluate the frequency and intensity of the incidents, and consider the potential threat it poses to you and your family’s safety. Documenting each incident with dates, times, and details can provide valuable evidence if the situation escalates.
## Engaging with the Landlord
In situations involving a neighbor’s disruptive behavior, it’s essential to engage with the landlord or property manager to address the issue. In this case, the landlord should be made aware of the severity of Andrew’s actions and his impact on your safety and well-being. It’s important to emphasize the urgency of the situation and request immediate intervention.
## Seeking Legal Advice
Consulting with a legal professional or seeking advice from local law enforcement can provide valuable insight into your rights and legal options in dealing with a mentally ill individual’s stalking behavior. Understanding the legal implications and potential courses of action can empower you to protect yourself and your family within the confines of the law.
## Implementing Security Measures
Given the recurring nature of the incidents, implementing security measures is crucial to safeguard your home and family. Installing security cameras, motion sensor lights, and alarm systems can act as deterrents and provide evidence of any further stalking attempts. It’s also important to reinforce the locks on your doors and windows to prevent unauthorized entry.
## Engaging with Mental Health Services
While it’s not your responsibility to address Andrew’s mental health issues directly, reaching out to local mental health services or organizations can ensure that he receives the necessary support and intervention. Communicating the severity of his behavior and its impact on your safety can prompt mental health professionals to reassess his treatment and support plan.
## Community Support and Awareness
Engaging with other neighbors and community members to raise awareness about the situation can foster a sense of collective responsibility and support. It can also serve as a means of gathering information about any previous incidents involving Andrew and potentially aligning with others to collectively address the issue.
## Exploring Temporary Accommodations
In extreme cases where the stalking behavior poses an imminent threat to your safety, exploring temporary accommodations, such as staying with friends or family, or seeking refuge in a safe location, can provide immediate protection while a long-term solution is being addressed.
## Responding to Immediate Incidents
In the event of any immediate incidents, such as Andrew attempting to enter your property or displaying threatening behavior, contacting emergency services and law enforcement should be the immediate course of action. Maintaining a clear and detailed log of such incidents can aid in the legal process if formal intervention is necessary.
## Prioritizing Self-Care
Facing such a challenging situation can take a toll on your well-being and mental health. It’s essential to prioritize self-care and seek support from mental health professionals or support groups to process the emotional impact of being stalked by a mentally ill individual.
âś… Assessing the Situation and Taking Action
In conclusion, dealing with a mentally ill child stalking you requires a multi-faceted approach that balances empathy, understanding, and a firm commitment to your safety. By engaging with the landlord, seeking legal advice, implementing security measures, and advocating for mental health support, you can take proactive steps to address the situation while prioritizing your well-being and that of your family. Remember, you’re not alone in this, and seeking support from relevant resources and professionals is essential in navigating through this challenging circumstance.
You can continue calling the police and complaining to the landlord when these things occur.
NAL, but I would find a lawyer and get a restraining order against the kid. That way, when he shows up again it would be breaking the order and then the police can interfere. Right now, he hasn’t physically touched anyone so the police won’t be much help. Keep calling them because the incidents need to be documented.
In the meantime, keep a close eye on your family and pets. This will only escalate from here. Above all else, stay safe.
Call the police when he’s there in the middle of the night, tell them there is someone trying to break in, quicker response time. I would try to find somewhere else to live. Keep all videos of him doing anything.
Restraining order.
IANAL but do have experience working with unstable individuals. If this post is for real, then – know this is not what you want to hear, but get out of that house. This young man is not being managed or treated adequately, the police are correct in saying that their hands are tied unless and until he does something more extreme, and while most folks with mental disorders never harm anyone the behaviors you describe here are concerning. A restraining order isn’t going to be particularly helpful – you are dealing with a person whose understanding of legalities and consequences is limited, and the system moves slowly and inefficiently in situations like this.
It is not worth your family’s safety and sanity to wait and hope that things get better – there is no indication that they will – and adding a newborn to this environment is not a good idea.
If police won’t do anything, call CPS about the unmedicated and untreated minor next door. Police only look at the issue and shrug, CPS actually has to investigate the home, the parent and the child. If they find he is unwell, they will remove him from the home. Make sure to include the incidents where you have been threatened in your CPS report/call. Tell them you are incredibly concerned for the welfare of your neighbors son and your unborn child.
If he’s 16 and living like this without being treated could you also involve CPS so a visit is at least documented?
Time to move. There is no fixing this situation and unless you want your family to be featured in a future horror movie GTFO.
Move. File for a restraining order. There is not nearly enough mental health treatment in this country. I feel sorry for the kid and his family, but your family is in danger.
I vote for just moving. The amount of effort and hell you’re going to have to go through just to get a half-assed solution, won’t be worth it.
How old is this child?
You could google “mental health court” in your area. If you are near Tucson, I know they have one. Go and present all this to the judge and seek involuntary commitment/residential treatment for Andrew. After the Gabby Giffords incident, they don’t mess around. Don’t trust that he’s actually “in treatment.” Mom could be taking him to her pastor who is telling the kid that what he’s doing is a sin, and calling it “treatment.”
NAL
Just move, gtfo. Dangerous as dangerous can be.
Those saying call CPS, good luck. They are usually just awful.
See if you can talk free to a legal aid attorney. It’s possible that due to the harassment and stalking, you can break the lease and move. ( Find your lease and take it with you to any consultation) It sounds like your landlord knew of this issue. Ask legal aid about how to get the kid a trespass warning so if he goes on your property, he will be arrested. Or perhaps you might have to get a restraining order.
Keep documenting! Keep calling the police. Call cps. Mentally ill/disable child is wandering unattended at night with sharp objects and breaking glass… That is not okay. It’s not just a danger to you, your wife, your child, and your unborn baby…. This young man is a danger to HIMSELF! He is not being properly supervised. ( The mom might not be capable of properly supervising him)
This kid probably doesn’t need to go to jail. He probably needs help. Most courts have mental health courts or things for juveniles… it’s much better that something happens NOW when he is a minor than when he is 19 and considered an “adult”.
This behavior is really frightening and shouldn’t be ignored. You guys are doing your best but I agree with others that you need to relocate ASAP. I know moving again is going to be a nightmare but this situation is a bigger nightmare. If you do call CPS, know that the mom will likely know it was you. I would be nervous to do that in fear of retaliation but something’s gotta give and I don’t think your family is safe at all. I don’t understand how this isn’t getting escalated through the system. Sorry you’re dealing with it.
Well that is terrifying. This is one of those pivotal moments. If you choose to stay, everything may or may not be okay with this highly disturbing child who seems to have an unhealthy obsession with your family. We don’t know. If you leave immediately, this child will no longer torment your family and everything will be fine as far as this is concerned. The choice is yours.
I would most certainly be taking my family and getting right the fuck out of there with the speed of 10,000 Usain Bolt’s.
I’m a lawyer, but not your lawyer. One area I practice in is Landlord-Tenant and while every state’s laws regarding unsafe conditions, duties of landlords, and duties of tenants are a little different, if you stated the facts accurately, this almost certainly is enough for you to break your lease. And IMHO you should have done that already.
As a long experienced lawyer and as a former police officer (who worked in a small community with THREE different levels of mental health facilities for the region) this isn’t going to end well. It’s a simple fact highlighted by the fact that the child’s mother is simply refusing to face facts and properly manage the situation (and apparently she can’t even manage a cat….) This isn’t a situation that can be managed by talking to the kid. This isn’t a situation that can be managed by the LL “doing something” unless that something is evicting the other tenant. That’s not going to happen until the kid does damage/harm and gets arrested. My money is on that being “too late” for your family when it happens.
The minute this kid does ANY damage to your property, INSIST that the police make a report and forward it to the DA. The HOUND the DA until he/she acts. I know what would happen in my state, but no idea for AZ. And you should have called the cops over his attempted break-in. This is the way to get CPS involved and get the kid the help that’s needed to protect him from himself and to protect the community.
It occurs to me that there was a reason that the apartment was vacant and available. Your family wasn’t his first.
This is beyond your control and the landlord was fully aware. Start looking for a new place asap. Have something set up ready.
Reread your lease there should be a clause in there about providing a safe environment.
Send the lease, police reports incident number footage whatever in an email to your landlord. Tell him he is not upholding his part of the lease. You want out and your moving out by XYZ date and make arrangements on your deposit.
Maybe this is me being paranoid but I would cover all my windows and making moving a one day thing. Get in and out of that place or move and go stay at a hotel. Even if you have stuff at your house still.
I’ve been in a slightly similar situation but not that extreme. I got out of my lease, got my deposit back, and was moved out within 3 days.
I’m sorry this is happening to you.
Can you move ? Really that’s the best option. Until then do not wait until the morning to call the police. Call every time he’s there to have the police come out. Call cps and report and offer to provide video. Document everything. He very likely may need to be institutionalized to get stable. Sounds like he has some severe untreated mental health issues.
This kid needs to be locked away
Move.
Just get out of the house. Seriously. This is very scary.
To add to what has already been said: Document the stalking behavior. Stalking is a crime. Maybe file for an order or protection. If he violates an order of protection there are more serious and enforceable legal consequences.
You need to move out immediately. Just leave and get movers or family to get your stuff. Your family is in danger.
OP, I second what a lot of others have said and think your order of operations here is
1) call police when he’s at your doorstep again
2) document with them the stalking behavior
3) contact CPS and potentially tell police this because they might have someone on deck to send. Do not mince words. Say he’s attempted assault and breaking in when he tried to grab your wife, is trespassing, has weapons and broken glass for intimidation multiple times in a row
4) get your wife into a hotel since he seems obsessed with her and get another place to live ASAP. It’s worth paying the double rent if need be for the month to crossover. People do really fucked up shit to women, but especially pregnant women. Everything he is doing is concerning but especially since she’s pregnant and he is fixating on it, I am particularly concerned for her safety. She needs to be elsewhere and safe.
Good luck
911
“This person is a physical threat to himself or someone else.”
That is the defining limit set by the US Supreme Court.
Talk with the Sheriff, and District Attorney about this adolescent’s actions and behaviors.
Assault on pregnant wife.
Visiting your property, armed at night.
The burned and cut doll.
Have videos copies ready.
Explain you feel unsafe and your family is threatened by adolescent’s actions.
This Adolescent needs treatment.
Parent may be overwhelmed, but is enabling.
Your landlord has some liabilities also.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/
The link discusses history and progress toward changes including USSC decisions
The police are correct their hands are tied if the child is being treated. However CPS does have authority in these matters and they will be able to determine if the child is being treated adequately (which is sounds like he isn’t).
Also gtfo asap.
Get your family out of there immediately and go to a hotel while you look for another place to rent.
I think your options have been pretty well voiced by different posters in the thread, which are basically; break your lease, involve the police, or involve CPS and then there’s the option to do nothing.
What you are describing is potentially sufficient enough for a founded complaint with CPS depending on the details.
>And that they can’t do much more than that since he’s unstable and “being treated”,And that they can’t do much more than that since he’s unstable and “being treated”
Police officers generally aren’t specialist in child welfare it would be unusual for them to meet the basic qualifications required for most child safety investigators. Their idea that they cant do anything is probably incorrect. A call to CPS would likely result in an investigation and depending on their finding it could result in a lot of different outcomes that would improve the circumstances. Besides just taking children into custody, they can also make sure that resources that are available for the children are provided to the children that are involved in the investigation. The situation that you are describing is certainly not idea for the 16 year old.
If I were in your situation, I would report this specifically to CPS. The report would be confidential, you also don’t have to give your name, and even if you did it would be still be protected from release. There have also been numerous people involved could have reported it by now.
It seems unlikely that the police are interested in treating this as a criminal matter.