#SexualHealth #Consent #PersonalChoices #EmotionalWellness
Hey there! It’s totally understandable to feel confused or conflicted about why you might have had sex when you didn’t really want to. 🤷♀️ Let’s dive into some possible reasons and ways to navigate those feelings.
External Pressures
Sometimes, external factors like peer pressure, societal expectations, or the desire to please a partner can lead to engaging in sexual activity even when it’s not what you truly desire. It’s important to remember that your body and your choices are yours alone. 💪
Emotional Desires vs. Reality
You may have found yourself in a situation where you felt emotionally compelled to have sex, whether to feel desired, loved, or even to numb painful emotions. Recognizing the difference between emotional desires and your true feelings can help you make more authentic choices in the future. 🌟
Communication and Boundaries
Open communication and setting clear boundaries are key in any sexual situation. If you found yourself in a situation where you didn’t want to have sex but still went through with it, reflecting on your communication with your partner and asserting your boundaries can help prevent similar situations in the future. 🗣️
Tips for Moving Forward
1. Reflect on the circumstances leading up to the situation and how you can assert your boundaries in the future.
2. Seek support from a trusted friend, therapist, or counselor to process your feelings and experiences.
3. Practice self-compassion and remind yourself that you deserve to prioritize your own comfort and desires. 💖
Remember, it’s okay to feel confused or conflicted about past sexual experiences. By understanding why you might have had sex when you didn’t really want to, you can empower yourself to make more aligned choices moving forward. 🌈 Stay true to yourself and prioritize your well-being above all else. You’ve got this! 🌸
Situations like: coercion, manipulation, threats, force, being in an abusive relationship, fear, having a partner who would not gracefully accept a no
I’ve had sex with my husband before when I’m really not in the mood. When it’s been a while we tend to get off sync. My husband is very touchy feely. He starts to get a little colder. He doesn’t do it on purpose, he’s not coercing me. But sometimes for me it’s “oh it’s been a while” sex, not “oh, I want to bang” sex.
Peer pressure
very tired but unable to sleep. had sex so that i can calm tf down and go to sleep. wasn’t really horny but thought “eh what’s the harm”
I’ve always been in committed relationships, so when that does happen it has more to do with me supporting my SO than being coerced into something.
Couldn’t say no to a loved one. I wanted him to be happy and satisfied with me so I did even though every cell of my body didn’t
Coercion.
To keep my husband happy, I don’t want him to start the whole “you don’t love me, you’re not attracted to me”
Like, “It’s better to do it than to argue about why I didn’t want to do it”
Guilt. Coercion. Force. “Obligation”. Not to mention that some men will treat you different if you don’t or it’s been a while.
Validation
As sad as it is to say it
To get pregnant
Because my wife wanted to and I want her to be happy. Doesn’t happen often but it’s not a big deal.
Because I knew it will end fast so better to have it once rather than seeing him worried about me.
When I want some time alone he gets worried if something is troubling me. Well he is a sweet guy but sometimes all I want is time alone.
I was scared of his reaction if I didn’t have sex with him.
With a recovering porn addict sometimes it’s hard to say no, scared he would relapse.
Because I didn’t want to hear the temper tantrums or experience the silent treatment.
for me sex is like taking a dump, i don’t always feel like it but always feel kinda good during it and so i don’t mind it.
I’m really sorry to read how many people ITT have experienced coercion
But to answer the question since I’m here, I once woke up to my ex girlfriend riding me. It was very much the beginning of the end of our relationship
I never have, largely because of a high libido, but also I hate sex when I’m not in the mood
For money, drugs and alcohol. I knew nothing else in life that could bring me joy in that period of time.
Because I thought he’d want to commit as in be in a relationship. If I didn’t he’d move on to someone else who was ready sooner. This doesn’t work ladies and gentlemen, so then I felt dumb and used in the end 🤷♀️
Because I want intimacy and don’t get it without sex
pressure, not directly from him, but in my head, because i knew we weren’t anything but friends with benefits and we’d spent a few hours together in the day for it to have not ended in sex. i knew that’s what he wanted, and i didn’t want him to think i was a prude or frigid.
Boredom, curiosity, fear, it was easier to give in than not to
Because I was madly in love with a guy that used me like a sex toy at his own convenience.
Anyway, lesson learned.
Felt like I was expected to
Felt like I wasn’t allowed or supposed to want to stop past a certain point
Thought penetration was owed, even though I didn’t really enjoy it, because that’s what the guys liked
It was easier that dealing with the guilt tripping or moodiness if I said no
Felt like I “owed” it to my partner because it had been so long
Felt like it was the only thing I was “good for”
I’m in a much better place now. But these were some of the many many reasons in my younger years
Still consent though.
Mostly I get in the mood after the first attempts of making out. Like lighting the spark! So when my bf comes along I roll with it and check out for myself if Im in the mood. Sometimes its not working that well so I go along with it at times. So we hit it off without really feeling it if he is very enthusiatic about. Normally I just tell my partner Im not feelin it and we stop.
But its nothing bad since I enjoy being close to him in general. The sex part is more something I don’t gain benefit from in this situation but nothing bad at all.