What was one of your biggest parenting mistakes and what advice would you give to future parents or those thinking of becoming parents? #ParentingMistakes #ParentingAdvice
Did you make any mistakes as a parent that you wish you could go back and change? Share your experience to help others avoid making the same errors. #ParentingRegrets #ParentingTips
Reflecting on Parenting Mistakes
– What mistake do you wish you could undo?
– How did you learn from this experience?
– What advice would you give to new parents?
Helping Future Parents
– How can others benefit from learning about your mistakes?
– What warning would you give to those on the brink of becoming parents?
– How important is it to share our parenting challenges with others?
the mistake my parents did was giving their kids phones at 13 years old but she gave my youngest sister a watch where she can only call and text certain people and can be tracked so they did better with her.
I waited to long impose household chores on my kids, it was always easyer and done better if I just did it myself.
Teach them houseold chores early and keep at it. It is much harder getting then to clean their room (or any other chores) when they are 8-10 years old.
It’s gonna save you time, fights and get them ready for the real world so that they can handle life!
So many young adults have no idea how to do basic shit like laundry, cooking for thenselves or even shower properly… (mom of 5)
Failing to acknowledge, affirm, and adequately support my oldest when they came out as a non-binary person at ~ 14. That was a terrible choice and my biggest failure as a parent.
Indeed, the early introduction of chores can prevent many issues as they grow older. I was part of the “do as I say, not as I do” generation, but applied a different approach with my own kids. We established a ‘chores routine’ from the age of 6, not just to ease my workload, but to instill a sense of responsibility and self-sufficiency in them. It involved routine tasks like setting the table, sorting laundry, and gradually more complex things as they got older. Now, as teens, they not only manage their chores without prompting but also take pride in their accomplishments. They’ve learned valuable life skills, time management, and the importance of contributing to the household. It’s heartening to see them so prepared for adult life, but it took consistent effort and not a little patience!
Lost my cool. Never hit but I guess they remember.
My son and my daughter-in-law started having their girls help out with chores starting at age one. The little ones actually enjoy helping unload the dishwasher and in other ways that they can. I wish I had thought of that.
Buying an iPad for a toddler. The electronics aren’t the issue, I think it’s a parent’s job to help teach their kids how to responsibly navigate the digital world. The problem is that Apple products don’t make that easy. As compared you can buy an Android tablet cheap. A lot of them come with a kid mode and Google allows you to create supervised email accounts, once the tablet is signed in with a supervised account, It gets censored by your guidelines all set by your own personal phone. You can see whatever they see and you can block whatever you want to block until the account owner turns 18.
Not paying gerber life grow up plan, now my kid is in the Marines…
I think I should have addressed my depression when I first realized it was effecting my relationship with my daughter.
If you’re going to give in, don’t say no in the first place. And if you’re going to say no, say no and stand your ground. every time.
My patience has diminished ever since having my first. I don’t know when it started, but I get frustrated/angry/ticked off much easier now. Which leads me to yelling. I hate it so much.
staying in a bad marriage for the sake of the children
Nutrition – My oldest was born in 1990. Food was changing, and I was asleep at the switch. It was a weird time where a lot of commentary focused around not “policing” your child’s food or creating body image issues. The result was she became an obese adolescent. I feel like that was an absolute failure in my part.
Once she got out on her own she took responsibility for it and is healthy and happy today. I actually apologized years ago to her for not being more proactive. She said she appreciated the apology.
Not having Kids.
I was not patient enough with my kids. I was a kid myself when I had them (21 years old), and not nearly mature enough to handle the responsibility.
Oh so many. But the one I feel most guilty about:
My son was 11 when they moved into a new school that was all stairs. Every day he’d complain about his knees and I wrote it off as him being lazy. Until the day he point blank said “hurts enough to see a DR”
Go to the DR to find out he has a severe case of Osgood shlatter’s disease and not only should not being doing steps, but needs to stop doing all sports.
He’s 28 now and still suffers but it’s not advanced to the point of surgery… Yet. But dam his X-rays look painful.
Shoulda just read more to my daughter to develop a deeper relationship.
My sons only 3 so I haven’t made my big mistake yet, or I have and the repercussions just haven’t come around yet. I can feel myself being on my phone too much. I’ve started putting my phone in another room during play so I can be more present. I have to actively remind myself a lot.
Feedback from my kids, they tell me that one of the main issues is that i, ‘dad’ do not value money and income. It’s true, i dont care about money, income, status, etc, but it has had an impact on them. The oldest sees it in himself–he’s gained it from me, and it makes him stand out with peers. He doesnt see the point in being rich EITHER. He’s said that he feels like i should have made it more of a priority, because he thinks, he too will be too willing to ‘settle’ for less, or being poor. I’m fine with it, he really isnt. They’re too aware of the cost of things, and dont even consider that money gets them things. That’s a chief complaint that sticks out to me so far.
I’ve tried very hard to eliminate the mistakes my parents made, so we’re not really standing on any horrible errors.
I think one we’ve made, is–both of their bio dads, are odd ducks. The one, has his in his life still, and is doing really well now after recovering from some early adulthood mistakes–the issue is, our oldest doesnt know him–and doesnt know he made those mistakes. We sheltered him too much from the reality of the mistakes an adult made. NOW that parent is coming back in his life, *not wanting to talk about that mistake*, and trying to blame mom for some of it–the same mom that went 10+ years all alone, pulling all the weight of raising the kid, and not letting that kid know the worst of what that parent did.
Now, we’re going to have to ‘shatter the illusion’ before he can get brainwashed into thinking the other parent is some sort of saint, that’s been wronged.
And, it makes me realize, the youngest (who had a sperm donor bail out 100% and go uncontacted for 5+ years now), needs to hear the truth some time too. We’ve avoided that, because we dont want him to feel rejection, or like ANYONE could fail to love him, *especially a bio dad*, but it’s just a thing we might have to bear down and talk about.
So–parents with a biological mom/dad out of the picture, *dont shelter them from it* so much. You dont have to make the other parent seem evil, or unworthy, but dont *hide* the bad things they did, like we have. It’s gonna bite us all in the ass.
Not intervening (somehow) in my youngest daughter’s relationship with social media.
Don’t be their best friend! Be their parents.
I’d say it’s not teaching them the basics of how things work. When my daughter moved out, she called one night that she lost power but the whole street still had it. I had to walk her through restting the breaker, because I always did it myself. She also called when her stove wouldn’t light and I had to teach her about the pilot light. Just general things that I deal with in both the home and the car that I should have involved her in. Also teaching about insurance and how to tell if something is a bargain.
I stopped tucking them in too early. I got frustrated because both of them required a lot of attention at bedtime. I stopped tucking them in and hug and kiss them sending them to bed to try to fix it. It was a mistake. They only want you like that for such a short time looking back on it and I wish I would have tucked them in for the rest of their lives lol. I feel it damaged our trust and relationship and we are not as affectionate as we should be because of it. I know you are tired (esp single parents) and just want a few minutes peace but trust me when I say you will have PLENTY of time to relax and your house will be too peaceful before you know it. Before you know it your house will be lonely the only mess will be your own.
My kid who was only 4 months old and could roll he hadn’t sat up yet, got tons of food on him.
So I took him upstairs to his changing table. Next to the table was his wardrobe.
I put him on the table lying down, while I was at his wardrobe picking clothes to change him into. I was standing about 2 feet away from him.
I look back to him after about 15 seconds and he was sat up and already falling forward and fell from the table flat onto his back.
We took him to hospital and he had fractured his skull. I had social services over to make sure I wasn’t an abuser.
Do not take your eyes off your children. And if you do have to, put them on the floor.
Allowing, even with parental controls in place, certain aspects of internet access to go too long between follow-ups.
I stayed married to my abusive ex-husband until my daughter was 11. She started talking to me like he did. She saw and heard way too much. I should’ve gotten us both out a lot sooner. I should’ve left when he gave me the silent treatment for a week when we found out we were having a girl.
I will tell you the mistake that my father made was that he always yelled at us. It was constantly him yelling at my brother and I for not doing this that or the other.
There was also a time when my brother broke something. My dad couldn’t figure out which one of us did it. So he grounded both of us. But get this, he prevent both of us from going trick or treating. I think I was in the 7th grade at the time. So it was around one of the last times I could go trick or treating without feeling like I was “too old” to go. I was extremely looking forward to it as I did every year. When he said we couldn’t go, that’s when everything changed forever. It was a complete act of betrayal. I never really talked to him again after that. From then on, and even to this day, I only say what’s needed. Nothing more.
Trusting the wrong ppl that weren’t family
Raising them in the cult I was raised in because I was a true believer. (Jehovah’s Witnesses)
Staying in a horrible marriage with their abusive father longer than I should have because ¹I thought that’s what God wanted thanks to my upbringing in the cult. ²I believed my husband’s promises to change, her therapy (he did but he didn’t change) and be a better father and husband.
³I wish I’d had more patience. I wouldn’t say that I was impatient with them usually but there were moments of impatience.
My boys were pretty smart. Being a smart kid often lets you skate. Instead of me complimenting how smart they were, I wish I would have complimented the effort. I’d rather have you work hard on something and get a C as compared to wait till the last minute to do it, even if you got an A.
Continue drinking