#CareerAdvice #CommuteStruggles #SingleParenting #ImposterSyndrome
Hey everyone! 👋 So, I’m in a bit of a pickle and could really use some advice. I have a potential job opportunity that’s an hour and a half away from home. The pay is great, the company is amazing, but that commute… 😬 Would you do it? Here are some points to consider:
– I’m a single mom, and my child’s father has agreed to help with childcare
– Worried about missing out on future opportunities if I pass this one up
– Extreme imposter syndrome making me doubt my abilities
Here’s my possible solution:
1. Consider negotiating flexible work hours or remote work options to make the commute more manageable
2. Look into carpooling or public transportation to save time and reduce stress
3. Give it a shot for a year to gain experience and then reassess for future job opportunities closer to home
Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Would love to hear your thoughts and advice! Thanks in advance! 🤔 #JobOpportunity #ParentingStruggles #CareerGrowth
You are not in a position to even be asking this question at this stage in your career.
Are you unemployed? What’s your situation now? That’s key information. That’s also 3 hours out of your day and massive wear.
That being said…making sacrifices, especially for your family for the long term, is something I could get behind.
I’ve done it. It’s rough. If you’re doing it by transit it’s a bit better, since then you can nap or read on the way home.
Super-commuting has been proven to not be good for you. People who do it have higher stress levels, depression, divorce rates, etc.
You wake up, eat, go to work, come home, eat, sleep, repeat every day until the weekend. Your whole life becomes working and commuting. I didn’t find it unbearable or anything, but it is just a fact that your free/personal time evaporates.
This doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t do it. Depending on your prospects, it may be worth it to take the job. And you do still have your weekends for free time. My concern would be your child–whether you can handle seeing them less and whether you being gone more will negatively affect them.
I done it because it was the only job I had at the time and I needed the money.
Thankfully I could take the transit so I watch movies or read
If it’s hybrid and pays well yes. On-site 5 times a week? The toll is rough.
Just remember that 1,5 hours is most likely in ideal conditions. Usually it will be longer, so you’ll spend half a working day’s time getting to and from work.
Was once in your position- commuted 2 hrs there and back for a job unrelated to my field but was unemployed and going to school. It was rough. After a 1.5 yrs Got an internship that paid $19/hr still one hr away but only had to go once a week. Now I’m hybrid and office is 15 min. The sacrifices you make now will pay off.
Would I do it? I did do it! Once upon a time in 2022, I received an interview for an IT position and got hired. There were some slight issues though.. it was a 80 mile commute, I had zero experience in an office setting, and the only “IT Experience” I had was fixing phones and computers at my old job in some retail electronic repair store.
Heading to work was 1.2 hours and going home with bay area traffic in California was about 2.5 to 3 hours. Most days I would throw on a crime podcast and try to endure the drive home. Other times I would stick around the office until traffic died down. If I was completely dead, I would just park and hide in plain sight to sleep in the back of the crappy Nissan versa I had at the time then shower at planet fitness before work the next day.
Did that for maybe a year and two months until I was able to save more. – fast forward to now, I live 20 mins away. That old commute sucked!! I was so sad and tired to be honest. There were moments where I felt like breaking down during my commute and I’d start tearing up because it drove me crazy knowing that I’ll wake up and have to immediately get ready before traffic next day. Though, I kept thinking about the people that I love and need to take care of to keep me going.
It was tiring but not as tiring as living paycheck to paycheck. Before this job I was working temp warehouse jobs so I’m happy that I didn’t give up on the opportunity
Addressing your imposter syndrome.
I’ve been working in my area of cyber for almost a decade, steadily rising the ranks. I still have imposter syndrome. There will always be something to learn that you don’t have enough experience with. Just keep pushing your boundaries. You might not be an expert at everything, but just take every opportunity to learn. And when you do become an expert in some subject, someone will come along with something that you didn’t know.
Addressing the job.
Keep in mind, even if it is 40 hours a week, its your part time job where you generate an income, so that you can do your full time job of caring for your family by generating an outcome.
Take the job. Listen to podcasts and audio books, you’ll be fine. Work there for 2 years then level up and find a job with a shorter commute.
I do 1.5 commutes in a hybrid role that is 3 days in office and 2 remote for more than a year now lol. It sucks at first but if the money pays well then in the end it is worth it. You never know but they might let you leave early to go home. Got to see how their work culture is first. Doesnt hurt to ask.
I’ve been doing it now for a year and half. I’m trying like hell to out this month and a new job. My current was also my first job in IT.
Hells to the no. Your time is worth more than that, to you, and your child. Additionally, I always suggest getting two years under your belt wherever you go, minimum, unless it’s a bump in title.