#EmployeeEngagement #TeamCulture #WorkplaceCommunication #EmployeeRelations #ManagingExpectations
Do your employees really want to know what you did on the weekend?
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where your employees seem overly interested in the details of your weekend activities? You’re not alone. Many professionals, like yourself, struggle with navigating the fine line between maintaining professional boundaries and fostering a positive team culture.
The Problem:
It can be perplexing when your employees inquire about your weekend adventures, especially when you feel like the details are mundane or not relevant to work. You might wonder why they are so interested in your personal life and how to respond appropriately without oversharing.
The Solution:
- Understand their intentions: While it may seem intrusive, your employees might be trying to connect with you on a more personal level to build rapport and strengthen relationships. Acknowledge their efforts and reciprocate by showing genuine interest in their lives as well.
- Share selectively: You don’t have to divulge every little detail of your weekend. Instead, focus on sharing highlights or activities that are relatable and show a bit of your personality without compromising your privacy.
- Ask questions back: Turn the conversation into a two-way exchange by asking your employees about their weekends. This not only shifts the focus away from you but also demonstrates your interest in their well-being.
- Set boundaries: It’s okay to politely redirect the conversation to work-related topics if you feel uncomfortable discussing personal matters. Establishing boundaries is essential to maintaining a professional demeanor while still fostering a supportive team environment.
Remember, finding the right balance between being approachable and maintaining professionalism is key to navigating these interactions effectively. By understanding your employees’ intentions and responding thoughtfully, you can foster a positive and inclusive workplace culture where mutual respect and communication thrive.
How do you handle these types of questions in your workplace? Let’s continue the conversation in the comments below!
Maybe they’re trying to create a connection with you. I don’t tell my employees everything about my life, but it’s hard to create trust without exposing some of your human side.
I would ask you at this point just to see if you ever gave a different answer. Pretty weird you do the exact same thing every weekend.
I usually tell them I am boring and perhaps share a cute and work appropriate story from the kiddo or a new milestone.
You are complaining that you work with decent human beings who show some sort of interest in your life because they basically spend 40+ hours a week with you. Don’t ruin this, this a sign you are being a good team leader and have built a team that likes working with you. You don’t need to be interesting, just make sure you reciprocate and show some sort of interest in their lives, however shallow that might be.
Your personnel may be curious about your weekends to better bond with or understand you. It’s fine to share what you’re comfortable with you don’t have to go into great depth if you’re not. Simply keep it light and nice.
As a student, I would ask my teachers questions to delay class.
They honestly don’t care. They don’t care about the details and they don’t care if you have kids or not.
They are just making polite conversation and part of polite conversation in the office is going into detail about what you did at the weekend.
It’s a dull but accepted way the humans bond socially.
It’s probably just small talk. If you don’t want to engage more, do what you’ve been doing. Otherwise, use it as an excuse to talk about something you’re excited about and they’ll either stop asking because they don’t want a long conversation or you’ll end up having nice chats that you enjoy.
I have the same types of talks with my boss, usually super brief, but I’ve found that when he mentions a new thing he got in passing (usually a tool or tech) he seems happy if I ask about it more. I like hearing people talk about things they’re excited about, and usually I learn something. It’s nice.
“Good. How was yours?”
“Good.”
“Cool, have a good day.”
They’re trying to engage with you as a person. They probably ask similar questions to each other.
In the USA, people usually ask you the question they want to answer themselves. Especially if they are a bit introverted.
😅
I have a manager who tells me every little detail of his weekend. I say mine was fine. I can’t say I went to work at another job. So he pries.
When he was explaining the weekend, he told me what he did, what grocery stores he went shopping at, what they bought, etc. How long he was at work, what he did at work, etc. He misses the point that I don’t care. I want to show up, do my job and go home. My life isn’t terribly exciting, but I don’t tell everyone, oh yea, I stayed home doing crafts and playing video games. Especially to someone who judges what you do and thinks that you should constantly be doing something physical.
Know your audience, I suppose.
They are going to start a union!!!
The nerve of these people, trying to build a human connection with the people they work with.
Asking about family is a safe topic and a way to connect. They are being nice because you’re their boss and they know it’s important to keep a good relationship with you. I would advise you to always be ready to reply with a short detail about the family (something wholesome or cute without getting too personal) and ask similar low-pressure questions of them.
Pretty sure this just means they like you a lot lol
I was the opposite. My (toxic, now former) boss would ask about my weekend and then proceed to ridicule me about it for the rest of the week. Mostly because I was child-free and he wasn’t.
He expected me to have grand adventures, and “Stayed home, played some of my latest video game.” just reminded him that he had just done family obligations. Which he hated.
“Just normal famliy stuff” should be enough. Both sides don’t need to sell the project. But if you did do something fun, share it, even if it’s just to hear your joy at doing it. It’s a safe space for sharing and relizing we are all humans with goals outside of TPS reports.
I work remotely and actually see this as a very important little part to maintain in my job. I always respond with a brief rundown of whatever the main event of the weekend was, even If it was bland, like doing yard work or something. If I saw a movie I’ll give a short three sentence movie review or something. The way I see it, The more personable you are the harder it is for them to let you go, on a personal level. You don’t want to be viewed as a disposable machine.
I am a team leader and take it as a positive sign if my employees ask about my weekend/holiday/Christmas Easter. I am the only single in my team, and leave out lots of details (like Tinder dates), but I tell them about my running, hiking trips; concerts, movies or plays that I see.
It connects – and I just turn the conversation around, if it gets too personal “so, what did YOU do on Saturday”?
Cause it’s small talk?
I think you might be reading too much into this. How are they asking for more detailed answers? People will say stuff like ‘oh is that all’ or ask for more info if your too vague, because it’s considered polite to interact. You will probably get more use out of ‘good, we went the playground with Fjodor Jr. What about you?’ then struggling to describe how the most interesting part of the weekend was a sale on pineapple. Although, tbh, you can still say ‘good, went shopping and got a sale pineapple.’
If my coworker was constantly telling me they flew overseas, went to expensive restaurants or out clubbing I’d think they were a braggart. Most people’s weekends are as interesting as buttered toast.
Lol i can relate to this. Just like when a server at a restaurant asks “any big plans after this?” “… No, Kelly, going out to dinner at 430 alone while my kids are at home with their dad and its 1hour until bed time at 7pm, was my big night out. Also, why is it any of your business what I am doing???” Then I have to remind myself that other people being polite and making chit chat is socially acceptable and I am sometimes just a very sleep deprived, depressed, anxious mom of 2 babies under 3yo that gets 0 alone time and generally isn’t interested in other people at all, especially strangers.
I have to make an effort. In reality no one cares, but it’s nice to be nice. We can do it!
When I had a toddler we talked about visiting new playgrounds the way other people talk about checking out the bar scene.
Be careful what you share. Keep it boring. They are not your friends.
It really doesn’t matter if one has kids or not, although some try to find social connections from work, always be kind, you do not know how much of a difference it can make speaking to peers for moral and finding human community in your workplace.
I’m a boring person and hate these questions too. However, I’ve learned that I’m reading too much into it as well.
They want to know because it’s human nature to want to connect with others. We spend a large portion of our lives at work, so it makes sense people want to get to know those they work with.
I don’t like to share too much because let’s face it, you usually can’t trust those you work with.
I hike a lot with the spouse and dog. Now when I’m asked, I just tell them about the hike, how the pup liked it. Sometimes I will share a picture of the pup on the hike. That seems to be what they are looking for and I’m comfortable sharing that information.
I will talk about video games I’m playing but I don’t really share about my cosplay because I don’t want them looking for my IG account, I’m not ashamed of what I cosplay but do have some more revealing cosplays, they are tasteful but I wouldn’t go to the beach/pool with my coworkers, so they can’t see me in a swimsuit type outfit.
Cuz work sucks and we are making basicass convo to make it through the day.
Monday – what did you do this weekend?
Tuesday – oh man this week is draggin by
Wednesday – halfway there, guys
Wednesday afternoon – what if we all just left early?
Thursday – Friday’s Eve, if it isnt done by 2pm itll get done Monday
Friday – whatchall gettin into this weekend?
Are you acoustic?
Most of the responses I see in this thread talk about just wanting human connection, which I also think is the most likely answer, but I think there’s another potential explanation. It’s possible some of them look to you as a mentor figure and want guidance on how to improve. When I was younger, I would often pick the brains of people I respected (either professionally or personally) to learn from them.
I still remember one of my squad sergeants was extremely analytical and professional at work, but was hanging out at 1 specific bar all weekend and had a group of friends there. To be fair, I thought it gauche to ask about his weekend drinking, but I certainly learned a lot from his nightly workout training that he shared with me.
My coworker also like to make small talk. I like to keep a light topic of conversation available; a new one each day.
For example: I’m thrilled to see the daffodils have bloomed, their bright yellow faces are so cheerful. Are they blooming in your yard yet?
Or: The frogs are singing out in the pond at night, I look so forward to this time of spring.
It’s a great way to have a conversation without giving away any of your personal life.
I don’t give an overview of my weekend, I just magnify one single topic.
Have you ever heard of having a relationship, having a conversation, taking interest in those around you, taking interest in ANYTHING beyond yourself, how about just being friendly ? I’m wondering why they want to be interested and friendly with you as well, if that makes you feel any better
I had a boss who never asked how my weekend was and rarely shared personal details about herself. Reporting into her was not a great experience; such secrecy/ indifference was a sign of larger trust and communication issues
To know if your life really sucks as much as theirs do.
I know my superior is asking out of connection.
But for me I ask to gauge if my colleagues are going to hold their own or are doing things that endanger the upcoming workload.
Like a colleague of mine does some hobbies where they sometimes sleep like 2-3 hours a night. After intervention they now use a PDO before they start their week.
But yah, they aren’t really a hundred percent, and if I have projects with them I will be extra careful after such a weekend.
I have another colleague I know if x happens y is the outcome.
Likewise I know when y happens with me z will be my work mood. I’m working on this, but in the meantime I have my teammates know that I will be more stressed and have a shorter temper than usual.
Maybe they are trying to build rapport with you, find a reason to want to trust you, to like you… to build a bridge so that when shit happens, they know who you are & want to be as productive as possible for their good and yours…. A million different reasons, just be glad they are asking & give a different answer once in a while. You don’t have to be best friends, but try to get to know who these people are….
It’s called small talk. Are you autistic by chance?
If concepts like this were based in logic and reasoning the world would be boring, humans like interacting with eachother because it was critical when we didn’t live inside bricks and concrete, now we do but we are still afflicted. Measure for how much you want the team to like you Vs what your comfortable with and find a position everyone gains from.
It’s just human connection.
Find a similar interest. Netflix show, or chicken nuggets if they are really that young 😂
Maybe you need to change it to a more exciting story? It could be yeah you bought groceries and you made a certain dish or tried a new recipe. That can invite them to discuss a range of topics with you or contribute to the conversation such as favourite dishes or they share a story about a failed dish etc